Mysteries

2010-11-20T21:30:00.000-08:00

An ugly truth. A clean break up. No longer be together anymore. People who don't treasure me, no point treasuring them. Just fuck off. Sad, disappointment? Nah, Qiu Ning stay strong. Want to play two-time? Karma will fall on you. Please take a mirror and look at yourselves? Accompany me everyday so? A goodnight message to me on the other hand message another? Hoho thanks ah, i remember someone told me, he's not like other guys who fan jian? I think all along i am keeping one time bomb with me. Hoho everything is over. Good luck and continue fat hope thinking you can two time other girls in the future. Hope you've got a "blissful" marriage ok. Don't let karma find you. :) Good luck. I ain't bad hearted, just being kind hearted to let you know. Play more girls, see in the end what you've got. Ok? Take care dude.

2010-03-06T19:48:00.000-08:00

Why suddenly sees me blogging?

Once I am blogging, you will know I am having problems.

Everytime I have trouble or problems to face, the only thing I can thrash everything out is

MY BLOG. I can express well by blogging and typing it down.

Now i finally understand one phrase that i should say it's really true.

: " A leopard will never changed it's spots. "

Indeed, the leopard is me. I am a devil.

I have understand why in my previous relationship, it's a failure.

Because of my fucking attitude. Sometimes i know i am in the wrong,

but i just wouldn't admit it. I stick to what i think i am ALWAYS RIGHT!

I don't blame the first guy for leaving me, it's the consequences that i have to bare.

Although after the first one left me, i told myself,

after this failed relationship, i need to treasure the second one.

Ya i did treasure the second one for the first 6 months.

But..... it turned out to be the same. I am ill treating him.

Some small matter, no matter i also want to get angry with him.

I don't know why, might be because i always like bully guys who treats me good.

Like i said, even i said before i want to treat my future boyfriend good,

but

leopard will never changed it's spots, now i really realise that this sentence,

is PERFECT for me.

Seriously i don't deserved a boyfriend who care and treats me good.

Whoever is with me, will suffer.

Even my parents told me before, if i don't change my attitude,

no guys will be able to tolerate my nonsense.

Well i guess it's true, i seriously can't change myself to suit another.

I am already trying, but my short temper makes it even worse.

Sometimes i really HATED myself for being myself.

I am getting bad to worse.

So you don't have to treasure such a girl like me.

I am not a good girlfriend.....

2010-01-19T09:08:00.000-08:00

Today suppose to be a happy day, gathering with yuan shan and hauyee,

@ crystal jade xiao long bao which is located at holland V.

But it turns out bad, real damn bad.

As usual had a big argument with him again.

Why everytime when meeting out with my friends,

there will sure be arguments. I really feel so so so awkward towards my friends.

I am so sorry to cause all these trouble infront of you guys.

Quarrels spoilt my mood therefore i do not really have mood to chat with them.

Yet my boyfriend says that I am laughing happily and not caring him at all.

i felt very nonsense. He doesn't even try to understand me and all he knows is

to think for himself. Not considering my feelings when i am with my friends.

Obviously i can't show my friends black face like as if they are the ones who makes

me angry, am i right? I know who to smile at and who not to.

I got my own ways of handling things.

If you are not the one who makes me angry, of cause i won't give you a black face.

Somehow i am really really sad and disappointed that he shout at me ONCE again,

After hauyee and yuan shan left.

This time round i cried again, after they left. I have been trying to hold my tears

already when i am at the restaurant.

I cried so hard even my eyes are swollen now.

Although now we have forgive each other, but my heart still hurts.

Really hurts. Hurt? Cause he did not keep his promise by not shouting at me.

I hope that there won't be next time. I am really sick and tired,

I am not sure how long can i hold on this relationship,

if all this still continues. Promise to me, is a very important thing,

that makes me trust or not to trust a person.

Once a promise is broken. Trust is all shattered.

Bits and pieces...... How long will it takes to recover? I have no idea.

Anyway, sorry to my buddies that i have spoilt their good day too.

Good night.

2009-12-30T07:31:00.000-08:00

Hy just left my house...... I am feeling so down right now. YA RIGHT NOW!
Although I try to stay calm and cool infront of her. But I feel like crying out to her.
I keep forced myself to relax while talking with her. I know she knows how i feel,
just that she keep chatting with me to divert my mind. Without her, no one could advice me what to do. Am I in the wrong or am i not? Why can't his mother gets to know me well.
Instead of getting along with me, no matter what i do, is wrong wrong WRONG!
I am on the phone with him and talking with him and not her. What for she join in the conversation and critised me? Although i know she is talking to her son, but she is indirectly
pin point at me. Saying out loud so that i can hear what she is talking. When i heard what she said to him, my tears just drop. Ya maybe she is not my friend nor kin. But i am just hurt that my partner's mum critised me. If she is nobody to me, i won't even give a damn about her. Why i am so angry and pissed? Because she is his MOTHER! If she is not his mother i will have already FUCKED her upside down. But what to do? i have to tolerate. I have told him, since his mum don't like me, what for being together? We won't be happy in the end. Unless his mum give us her blessing. I have been trying to give in to his mum, whenever i sees her, i will greet and show mannerism to her. What's more she want? Is it a break up can make her feel happy so that she can keep her son with her? Isn't that selfish? Another thing which he came clear to me that he used an excuses that he mum fall so that he could not fetch me back from work to home, instead he can only meet me at my house there straight. He says that actually the truth is that he argue with his mum about me. Why so much trouble and effort to lie to me again! I am freaking disappointed although i know it's a white lie....... All i want is the truth of everything and stop making up stories so i can feel sorry and pity for you. Please tell your mum that, I asked you to swear is because of the things you did. Make me do this. And it's not my fault for being like this. In order for me to trust you I only have this way and you are the one who say that you will do whatever it takes to let me believe in you again. But did you or not. You lied once again. I hate liars. You can tell me it's white lies but when things became big, it will no longer be white lies. Understand?

2009-12-18T17:34:00.001-08:00

Have been long long time since i update my blog.

Writting this post is to let me release my stress i have these few days.

It has been accumulated in my heart i feel like i am bursting out real soon.

I feel so stress, so tired.........

Haven't been in good terms with my boyfriend this few days.

What's more? His temper, his attitude is all coming out.

I really hate it! Now, little things can make him burst out on me.

Shouting at me right infront of the public where people are looking at us,

IT DAMN LOUD TILL THE PEOPLE SHOPPING STOPPED AND LOOK! ATMOSPHERE SILENT...

showing me faces and sorts. I am really pissed off.

Pissed till i only have one thinking, "break off".

I already have zero tolerance on people who shout at me.

Yet a boyfriend doesn't understand what I want.

Thou i know he treats me good, but sometimes i really can't tolerate the way he treats me.

Ups and Downs, tired.... really tired.....

Seems like things work out for now and he promised me that he won't shout at me again.

But is it true? I asked myself. Will he do it again?

I've told him, I am the person who i hate people shouting at me.

One more time, I will leave. Not because i don't love you anymore.

Cause i am being forced to do so. And you FORCED me.

The shadow of Victor seems to be back from him.

It makes me feel damn scared.. damn damn scared..........

Why i said that, it's cause the both of them can't control their emotion well.

I already have the fobia there.

I just feel like crying out loud. I ain't as strong as some of my friends,

although i might look happy-go-lucky to my friends,

comes to relationship, i am weak.

Friendship is not smooth as well as my relationship. I don't know what the fuck is going on.

Hy will be leaving in approx 2 months time.

I will have one less buddy whom i can confide to.

I really feel so stress.......Typing all this post with my tears dropping non-stop.

Who can tell me what to do?

I am a failure in everything.

A TOTAL FAILURE.....

2009-11-13T08:22:00.000-08:00

Wee~ Friday! Off day for the weekends!:)

2 more days and it will be OUR 1 YEAR 3 MONTHS anniversary:)

Although I know to a lot of people, it's not consider as long.

But well I am happy that we are still together now.

His caring his love his concern, is enough:)

Anyway happy advance anniversary.

I know i haven't been treating him well,

always attitude, show faces and get angry for small matters.

Sometimes really feel guilty that he have to tolerate all my nonsense.

Thanks for being so understanding although sometimes you scolded me back.

Last but not least, I am sorry for my attitude all these. Hope you won't mind=p

Anyway,........

Tomorrow meeting my boyfriend, so have to sleep early=p

GOOD NIGHTS!!

2009-10-31T10:42:00.000-07:00

Recently started work at Aljunied as Admin Coordinator.

The boss and the workers there are quite nice just like a family.

Although all aunties and uncles, but still alright.

I just do finish my work everyday and home sweet home.

Have been working since 28th Oct, 3 days.

And guess what, I got my PAY! LOL!

So shoik huh. Today got the urge to blog cos something happen.

Went Carrefour at Suntec City with my sista Hauyee.

While waiting for my Boyfriend there, we saw the Halloween Corner,

so me and her decided to go there and play with the props and masks.

We only play and took pictures for a few mins,

then a stupid fucked up uncle talk to us in a xia lan attitude,

"HAVE YOU GET WHAT YOU WANT?"

At first i find it no harm, so i just answer " No need".

After that i think and think and realised that he is actually showing us attitude.

What a fucking bad service! So we don't care him and walk to the other side.

Who knows he come to us and repeated the same question again.

This time round he say us, YOU ALL HAVE BEEN PLAYING FOR HOURS.

Then HY started to shoot him back, " Did we play for HOURS? We only come here for few mins." At that moment I just kept quiet.

Then HY ask me continue to play, don't care him.

After that he continue to say us, " Don't feel shame on yourselves for playing here."

Suddenly damn ANGRY, I just shout at him, " IF YOU NOT HAPPY THEN DON'T WORK!

OTHER PEOPLE PLAYING YOU NEVER SAY THEM YOU SAY US."

Then he mumble to himself and started to take photos of HY.

I started to shout at him again, " YOU BETTER STOP TAKING PHOTO OF US."

and point my fingers at him. At that point of time all the people looking at us.

After that my boyfriend came. I told him that the uncle took photo of us.

WAH HE EVEN MORE HOT THAN ME! STRAIGHT AWAY SHOUTED AT HIM.

CARREFOUR TURN SILENT. PEOPLE WATCHING SHOW-.-!

At first we already wanted to leave but he still taking photo of us.

My boyfriend suddenly just let go of my hand, shout and walk towards him.

I faster chased up wanted to stop him as i am afraid that he might punch the uncle.

After that he shout finish his words and i just pulled him away.

The fucking pervert uncle still showed his phone to us and grinned at us.

CB KIA. Scold him still not scared sibei xia lan.

First time ever I quarrel with a stupid people in the public.

REALLY THROW MY FACE.

NEVERMIND FORGET IT. Anyway, most importantly enjoy the day

with my sista HY and of course my BOYFRIEND:)

2009-09-30T10:54:00.000-07:00

Back from work another fucking tiring day.

Stupid i hate the OM there.

Just one mistake and she marked me. Damn. What a BITCH.

Another 1 is just like a 2 headed snake. What to say?!

Aiya forget it la. Just do finish my work and home sweet home that's it!

Yawns just finish playing audition with my boyfriend. Haha. He's a NOOB!!

Still dare to name himself as superman. Yucks. LOL!

Hais the blue black on my leg is still swollen.. Damn.

Now chatting with xiaoling on msn. Kinda miss working days with her.

She's a nice friend whom i know in Courts.

Got time must meet her out.

REALLY MISS COURTS STAFF ESPECIALLY MY EX COLLEAGUE!!!

MY BIG FAMILY! Although most of them are malays, we are really like one big family.

Really clique with them very well.

Now keep sneezing...... damn gao wei....

Wanna fall sick already la!!

Gotta sleep early. Yesterday went out with my darling whole day and bought some new clothes and a jeans. My stupid boy keep paying for me.. idiot.. even had my haircut at night and also he pay.

Feel so bad using his hard earn money.

This sunday going to his cousin wedding dinner at night with his family.

Very excited. Awaiting for that day to come!! Yippee!

So long never had a wedding dinner le.

I think if the dessert is ORH NEE HE SURE FINISH THE WHOLE BOWL LA!!!

FATTY BOM BOM!!! HAHAHAHA!!!

Ok gotta sleep le. 2AM now. GOOD NIGHT!!!

Last of all, Darling i miss and love you.

MUACKS!!!!

2009-09-27T10:47:00.000-07:00

Another tiring working day! It's been 3 days so busy working like hell!

Finally after tomorrow will be my off day! Woo hoo!!

Hais sian arh....

Now it's already 150am.

Just came back from Noor's house. Went to her house for visiting for Late night Hari Raya.

Hehe don't know why i see her i feel so happy.

She's just like a mother to me. So love her.

Went there eat her delicious home cooked food. Wow really damn nice ok!

Thanks Hubby for accompanying me go there. I love you ok.

Feel neglact him while talking to Noor. Sorry hope you don't mind ok.

But he can really entertain himself by watching the TV.

I was busy eating my food and my head went up and down and i can see that his head also up and down. -.- because why? CAUSE I AM BLOCKING HIS VIEW WATCHING TV!

Hahahaha damn cute la he.. then i purposely up down up down till he look at me=p

Hehe anyway a great day with Noor and the rest of them.

Especially my Boyfriend who is always there for me.

Send me to work and fetch me back from work almost everyday-.-

Sometimes feel kinda guilty seem like making him very shag and suffering....

Hais.. ok la i will end here.. tomorrow have to work again.. so have to sleep early.

GOODNIGHT

DEAREST BOYFRIEND I LOVE YOU~!

2009-09-24T03:14:00.000-07:00

I feel so damn damn fucked up now!

Just saying him eat so much like a fat pig only leads to another quarrelling.

I am very very sick and tired or quarrelling already.

From the moment he talk to me so loud i already trying to control my temper.

Trying not to argue back and talk in a good manner.

But he, talk more and more loud till i cannot tolerate.

Really damn angry. Then he said " i don't want to talk already".

Makes me more pissed off.

I told him don't talk don't talk la and just karp my phone.

So i just offline my phone better so he don't have to call and talk to me anymore.

At the point of time i was thinking,

if the both of us not happy being together and always quarrelling,

what's the point still together now? I feel like telling him,

let's stop our suffering and end it better.

I don't wanna always make him suffering with my attitude.

Always have to compromise with me. Sometime i thinking,

why so XINKU? For what?

I think that he sure can find someone better than me.

Don't have to keep giving in to me. No point....

I really feel like telling him now, but i don't wanna distract him from working.

I don't want him always because of me then he leave his work behind and come find me again.

Actually going to find him tonight. But now? I really don't know going or not....

I very FAN!!! Should this relationship be continue or what?

GRRRRR!!! I feel like letting him FREE.

I FEEL I ALWAYS ILL TREATING HIM!!!

I just sucks OK.

2009-09-18T23:05:00.000-07:00

WAH TIRED TIRED!!! After 4 days of straight working!!

Hais i feel that i never learn much in this job cos no one is teaching me much!

Mostly on my own. See customer just serve.

I am not assigned to any department yet.

Hais nevermind just learn as i do. The more i do the more i will learn.

Have to be more independent.

So far the people there is ok. But still not too sure la.

So have to slowly examine how the way they do work.

But for me i will not be so close to my working colleagues cos have to self protect.

It's better to be independent than always counting on others.

But anyway thanks to Sonny who teaches me lots of shoe knowledge.

Appreciate it. Luckily i still got yuan shan with me so i am sure she will teach me well!

COS I KNOW SHE WILL! HAHAHAHA!

But for the first few times of cos i will trouble her a lot, that goes without saying.

Anyway have to get used to it, cos i don't wanna job hop anymore.

I hope she can work long with me la.

Scarly later is i leave first.... hahaha! Shouldn't be la.

Oh ya recently never really update my blog cos working really makes me.........

DAMN FREAKING TIRED~

Chit chat with my dearest on the phone awhile only my whole brain wanna shut down.

Then when he talk so much, the next day i sure forgotten what he told me.

LOL don't know why these few weeks or months my memory really failing at night.

Can't concentrate much.....

Anyway 15 Sept is our 13 months, Sorry never wish him,

Happy 13 months Anniversary boy:)

Ok will update again, HAVE TO REST WELL IF NOT MY BACK ALL ACHING!!

2009-09-13T12:24:00.000-07:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME! I AM VERY HAPPY TODAY!!!!!

Early in the morning daddy gave me a BIG angbao:)

Thanks DADDY I LOVE HIM SO SO SO SO SO SO MUCH!!!!

Today went out with my boyfriend to COMEX SHOW last day,

very crowded, boyfriend nearly got into an argument with a stupid fucking lady!

Luckily boyfriend was cool enough not to argue with that damn bloody BITCH!

Such a low class people! Anyway forget about that.

Actually went there to check out the pricing for guitar hero for my WII.

But no luck, heard from the sales girl that first day already sold out:(

Nevermind, went shop around then till 6plus reach home.

Canadian pizza was here. So waiting for all my friends to arrive.

1st- Yuting ( ahma ) & her boyfriend

2nd- Hau Yee & Jun Rong

3rd- Yuan Shan & her boyfriend

4th- Ai Feng

5th- Joanna ( Due to working )

Hehe, Thanks all for coming, really appreciate it:)

My boyfriend really entertain my guest well, really glad that have him with me!!

DEAR THANKS A LOT FOR HELPING ME!!! I LOVE YOU!!!

But he like treating my house like his home-.-! HAHA!! Like know where i put all my things. LOL!! Help me clean up, serve drinks and food, really like my 100% husband.

HAHAHAHAHHAAHHAHA!!!

We ate pizza, cut cakes, chit chat and play WII.

Thanks all for the present. I love it!

Afterall, a very very sweet memory for my 21st birthday:)

Muacks i love all of them, especially my boyfriend:)

He did a lot for me, I just need him so much=p

2009-09-11T10:00:00.000-07:00

Thank You boyfriend for the beautiful 15 pink roses.

Saying you're sorry.

This few days I am always very harsh towards you,

never show any romantic actions towards you,

i know that sometimes you really feel sad and disappointed with my actions.

I know sometimes i am kinda unreasonable but you still gave in to me.

Seriously i am the one who are really sorry for my behaviour towards you this few days.

I am also at fault. I do love you anyway. So please do not doubt my love ok hubby:)

I LOVE YOU ANG GUAN NAM

2009-09-03T07:25:00.000-07:00

Yesterday came back from Genting. Anyway enjoy my days there.

The 3 days there he has been taking good care of me.

Anyway it's already over. Back to Singapore.

Things always goes smooth and bad these few days.

I am damn damn FUCKED UP.

I don't wished to, but i keep find out things that i don't wish to see.

Maybe it's heaven's will to let me see.

I just don't understand why some people like to hide things from others.

Maybe everything they say just to cover up themselves.

But i think that no point doing it cos things will always be reveal sooner or later.

Example,

She used to be your "so called" ex and yet tell me she's just a friend saying,

"happy 1 month"(for friendship)

is that ridiculous?and i thought only couple will say that.

I tried trusting him whatever he said.

But things doesn't tally.

Finally found out that they really used to be together and yet he keep denying it.

I feel being cheated. Why can't this small matter he just tell me.

And now i found his blog. I found more answer from there.

Shiok huh? Compile everything together, i really feel so much being cheated by his words.

I don't know i still can trust him or not.

I really can't tolerate liars. Even if it's a white lies.

I thought that everything i can just wash away after Genting,

But...............

I really don't know i can hang on with this rs...

although i know that now he only have me, he treats me well,

but i just hate liars. I want everything say out CLEAR

NO HIDING! CAN?! I HATE IT!!!

I AM VERY UPSET AND I HAVE NO MORE TRUST IN YOUR WORDS!

CAN YOU LET ME HAVE MORE TRUST IN YOU?

1 year with you, be good or bad, I have nothing to say. Just don't lie again and again.

I know you are good,

BUT YOU ARE BAD WHEN YOU NEVER CLEAR THINGS OUT WITH ME AND LYING!

2009-08-16T02:24:00.000-07:00

Happy 1 Year Anniversary!~

Thank You for the 20 Roses and Thank me for our couple ring:)

Though both of us are working on the 15th,

we met after work to celebrate.

Acutally plan to go chomp chomp to have nice food,

but after that he change plan and we decided to eat nearby my workplace,

which is located near cineleisure,

the kopitiam there got seafood that i want to eat that is

none other than

STINGRAY!

Ok we ordered stingray, kangkong and fried omelette with shrimp.

Woo nice and filling.

After that we went to cine to watch

ORPHAN.

Quite a nice show, is like we can never guess the storyline before hand.

Haha, watch till 4am then cab home is around 4 plus.

Went bath and he called me when he reach home.

Chat for few mins and then SWEET DREAMS!~

**Thanks for everything to my boy. I love you~~**

2009-08-03T08:43:00.000-07:00

WOW so long didn't blog. No time to blog nowadays. Working in bugis Nike for 1month plus and now they transfer me to orchard central. It was quite tiring as the operating hours is a lot difference from bugis. From 11am-930pm and from 11am-11pm. 1 and a half hour difference. Oh man, don't feel like working already!!! DAMN DAMN DAMN! I wanna go back bugis although my CRM there is kinda fierce, but i already used to it. She's good sometimes not always that strict. Hmm forget about it, if i cannot tolerate the working hours i might quit one day.

Back to today, is my boyfriend's 22ND BIRTHDAY! Spend the whole day with him and one of his buddy in malaysia. ONCE AGAIN HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ANG GUAN NAM! HEHE. I am happy with him the whole day thou this morning nearly get into a quarrel again because of a small matter. And he actually slap himself quite hard on his face saying it's his fault until very serious. I see already felt damn heart pain. Sorry baby i never angry with you ok. Anyway we went to lots of shopping places. We ate hot stone salmon, ostrich and steak. Wow NICE!!! Too bad i did not take photo of it. Haha, after which we went to another shopping centre to shop for clothes and my bag. End up he bought 2 bermudas @ 60RM and i bought 2 bags @ 70RM. I also bought a thermoflask bottle for me to bring to workplace cos i wanna make honey lemon and i wanna maintain it's coolness. We then went to city square to watch a movie call "Overheard". Nice show. Will reccommand to watch. Hehe. Then went to sentosa hotel there to eat seafood. Don't be mistaken, sentosa hotel is in malaysia, and it's like a coffee shop. Jui lim his friend treat us eat:) But i still help to top up 50RM as he does not have any stable job yet. Anyway nice food for today:) never really take photos. Only some. Will update later:)

Gotta end here, tommorrow working so have to sleep well. Nights:) Upload photos other times.

2009-07-15T00:12:00.000-07:00

WAH so damn long never update my post already. Hehe currently busy with my new job. 1 week with 2 off days, but i still no time to blog cos everyday i am not at home. Working in NIKE Bugis as retail assistant. Damn tiring, body aching everyday since the very day i work. Haha. Started on the 19th of June. Haha. Today actually going out with my boyfriend since today is our 11 Month Anniversary. But his colleague is sick so he have to cover for him. Hais this week no off day for him so have to wait till next week. So today, have to stay at home:( friends not free either. But well nevermind cos tonight will be going prawning at punggol till tommorrow morning then he go to work again then i will be heading back home to sleep, 2 off together. Wee~. Hehe. Well but i know will be damn tiring for him. Hais. Ya recently bought a COACH Handbag at $209 at ORCHARD Galleria. Haha. Daddy use his $100 vouchers and i pay the balance. Damn nice. I love it. Hehe got too much things to update don't know where to start man. Ok well then i will just talk about recent stuff. Went JB recently, have lots of things to shop. Everything is damn damn freaking cheap. Eat shop and lots. Bought a few clothings, pants and most importantly my VCDs.
Ok then On the 30th June, went to Joanna's Birthday. Thanks boyfriend, took day off just to accompany me. Meet up with the rest. Suddenly saw valerie appear. Damn never tell me she's back. So bad of her. Haha! Ok. Acutally a lot of things to write but i can't remember much. Ok talk about yesterday, accompany boyfriend to his school to enquire about his Marketing Cert which they claim that he never take his exams, so no cert is going to be issued to him. So i advice him to make a trip down to his campus to ask everything. Finally everything is solved, their system clogged up. After that went to Vivo to have our breakfast at Mac. Went to toilet and found out that my button on my clothes is missing. So he bought 2 t-shirts at levis Signature for me. Thanks baby. Send me to my workplace and we take a look at 1 carat ring. Hahahahaha!!! Wah lau now i am super craving for that bits and pieces of diamond carat selling at $400++ So shining!!! Stupid LAAAAAA all because of him keep bringing me to see all those ring...........After work yesterday, we make a last minute decision to meet up at dohby. Met up with him, smell smoking smell on his body. He quickly admit that he smoke 1 stick. I promised him that i won't get angry with him if he tells me the truth, but i just don't know why. I felt damn disappointed, he already quitted for 2 months yet he smoke again. Even 1 stick. I don't want him to smoke at all. Damn disappointed until i feel like crying. So i showed him faces and we just stay quiet. Went in Mrt i told him, i know i have no rights to ask him to quit smoking cos i am just his girlfriend like what my dad told me. I can't control a person up to this extend. But it's for his own good. Too disppointed so i asked him to go home by the red line and i go home myself by the purple line. He just walk off and i walk off too. I board the train. Thinking and thinking. Wondering will he go home if i just leave like this. So i decided to stop at little india and wait for him to sms or call me. Then i recieve his sms saying he is still in dohby. So without any consideration i just board the train on the other side and went back to dohby. He just stand outside the control station. I saw him and went to hug him. He hug me tight and started crying, saying that he afraid that i might leave him forever. I was so heart pain at that time. Console him till he stop crying. Actually i don't mean to get angry with him but i just don't know why. But I am glad that at least he admit it. I hope no more next time. Anyway i stopping here. Waiting time passed for tonight.

2009-06-14T00:44:00.000-07:00

UH OH~ UH OH UH OH!! hais so freaking sian life without jobs.
Please please please i want a job which i enjoy my time with.

Yesterday went out with hy, ys to vivo. Chit chat and walk walk shopping around. It's GSS! But too bad i can't shop, no money!! Anyway while shopping in TANGS, i saw this pierre cardin wallet, small and simple. So i choose to buy it. Aww,anyway it's quite cheap so it's alright. My GUESS wallet is damn freaking big that i buy 1 year ago. Hee time to change wallet to allow more money to flow in~~~After that my boyfriend come VIVO to find me straight after finish his reservist. Haha kinda touched. Anyway that's what a boyfriend should do am i right?! Hah. After that follow by Jun Rong while we sitting near the sea to chit chat. Skies so dark and raining, so ys decided not to play basketball and we decided to go to suntec to meet up her boyfriend to see the NUM sales. Nothing much thou. Then me and my boyfriend went to the next room to see what thing can we buy. Then we see chocolate selling 4 for 11 bucks. Quite cheap for the chocolate. He buy for me:) Thanks dear. After which we went to PC show. So packed with people. We are at the back of them and we separate from them. Then we went to COURTS booth to take a look whos there. Saw Paul, Andy, Tumadi, Ken, Tiffany and most importantly, NOOR!!! Miss her damn much although only few days i never see her. Finish visiting the rest then we went out to look for hy n ys. Went to watson sales and saw pei xin. Haha she looks stunned while she see me. I think she might be thinking who am i? LOL! Ok hungry and went to eat JUST NOODLE. Finish eating and we went home. Jun Rong send hy to serangoon and he took bus home. Boyfriend came to my house and accompany me till late night around 1+ and went home. Thanks for the company.

Overall a nice triple date. Haha.

2009-06-12T10:28:00.000-07:00

Waiting and waiting for jobs opportunities. Please come to MAMA!

Aww, nevermind , just goes with the flows.

Just no more OFFICE JOB! =P

2009-06-12T01:51:00.000-07:00

Wahahaha! office job sucks la!!! yesterday first day of work i quitted already. OMG right. HAHAHAHA! The first moment was when i reach there, they told me that my office is not at level 5 which i thought it was at first. Cos i've seen the environment in level 5 is quite good. But end up they told me is at level 4. Cos level 5 is all quite young staff, compare to level 4, all the staff there more than 10years over there, old staff. At first they ask me to type the chinese sentence. Still feel ok at first. But after that, i slowly type and type. The girl beside me is also a new staff who just came 2 weeks before me. Talk to her since she's also around my age. Hmm, the both of us keep using the chinese dictionary to find words. Haha. Pathatic. I sit there till my butt and back pain. Even headache. After that around 2 plus, then we went for our lunch nearby. Hais really very boring kind of job. Keep sitting there looking at the computer screen, and type. After my lunch, my mentor ask me to go over to another computer to surf for HK Horse Racing information and key into excel. Copy and paste all the matches to the excel. Then key in everything in order. Many steps to memorise. The winning bet money must key in correctly, if not we will have to pay ourselve. So dman many things remember. After finishing all the re arranging, we must save to this folder and that folder. Pull and drag into floppy disk. Then use the command prompt to do the data. What the fuck. While she teaching, my brain almost shut down. So damn boring damn lifeless ok! I really sit until i very scared of sitting! My butt damn PAIN till gonna numb!!!! No choice, i try to tolerate in the office but at the end of the day, i really don't like this job, so i decided to tell my supervisor that i wanna quit. Feel kinda awkward but no choice i don't want myself to drag all the way there. So i return the access card and my locker key on the spot. Free labour for the day! HAHA. Think for now i am more suitable for retail jobs as i am the kind of person who love to talk alot. I cannot sit whole day keeping quiet. Hais.

Nevermind i am sure i can find a job real soon! JIAYOU TO MYSELF!
For the time being just slowly send my resume, waiting calls, like what my dad says, don't send too much in one time, if not all call i reject my circle of job will be lesser and lesser. So i send little by little if really no calls for 2-3 days i will send in again. Now just slack for awhile. But i will be very poor. Hais. Just stay at home don't go out lorrrrrrrr..........

Anyway my baobei will be out tommorrow, not today, still feeling ok, not that much of disappointment. Hehe think i independent already. Few days never talk much to each other i finally get used to it. Wee that's a good thing for me. So i won't have to keep feeling gao wei. Never talk on the phone i just online do my things and stuff and chat with my friend in msn or just play audi. But no matter what i still will miss him everyday, everytime, every min, every sec. Tommorrow finally can see him already, hope there won't be any clog up again. IF there is, then no choice, meet some other times then.

Now my main concern is JOB! JOB JOB JOB HERE I COME!! COME TO MAMA!!

2009-06-09T22:12:00.000-07:00

Last day of resting! Working tomorrow~ Phew wonder how will it be like. Excited, scared, nervous... All kinds of feelings. But tomorrow i will know how is it like. So i don't worry so much first ya! Work and i will know how is it! Hope it will be smooth:)

Wake up early in the morning today just for painting our rooms. 2 mans came to our house to paint. Woo hoo new look of my room. But I am real damn tired and i have no where to go. Go out today? Nah, tommorrow have to wake up early, so i rather rest and somemore today wake up 8am-.- WHERE GOT ENOUGH SLEEP COS YESTERDAY SLEPT AROUND 3AM! Now i only can sit at the sofa, surfing net, eat and SIT. Whole day do nothing, just sit here stare blankly into the screen. People chat with me i just chat. Weather so hot somemore and my first day of menses. Grr, stomach abit cramp. Sweating! I wanna sleep but no place for me to sleep!!!! Got an idea of going to Hotel 81 nearby my house to sleep a few hours there with air-con. Shiok. But my boyfriend doesn't want me to go to that place:( Think my parent won't allow too. But i am really tired leh. What to do?! Very fed up leh. How i wish my boyfriend is not in camp so i can go his house and sleep!! HAHA!! Aiya don't wanna talk about it anymore, JUST WAIT!!!!

1 more day and i will be able to see him already~! :) happy happy. Few more days will be our 10 months anniversary. Soon will be 1 year and goes on. Baby baby i miss you. Now you in Camp i know is quite tough for you cos i know you hate hot weather without air-con. But few more days ok, just endure:) Friday meet you sure cook stingray give you eat. Make sure lots of chilli let you cannot take it. Hehe! Saturday and sunday you are mine too! "P Ok end here will update on tommorrow's outcome! whoo~

2009-06-09T08:59:00.000-07:00

Hais just came back from home after outing with Alan, wee kiat and 2 other strangers, a girl and a guy whom i don't even know their names. Anyway still communicable. Went pool, follow by mac and went Time Zone for some arcade. After which went home.

Planned to have a nice chat with boyfriend as tonight he's free compare to yesterday, end up.........
QUARREL AGAIN!!.........
sometimes i really don't understand why this few weeks we keep quarreling. I feel very stress. Everytime we quarrel, i will be prepared for him to say break up or ask me to leave him find a better guy or don't talk anymore. Because these few words always come out from him.

Just now talk through everything on the phone. Sort out everything before he went to sleep. Although everything might seem fine, but in my heart, it's still kinda not fine yet. Are we meant for each other or we might just end up like my first relationship, after 10months plus being together, i enter a new job, then split up. Everything seems like repeating the same history. I am really scared when i enter this new job, we might break up. Just like when i enter Courts not long after resigning from my previous job, we broke off. I am afraid this might happen again due to quarreling.

PS: Thanks to a friend who tell me a own make-up story about a couple. Thanks for the advise.

baby, this is what i fear of ok. it's not just simple quarrel that i stress about. Accumulated quarrel for this few weeks, somehow people might just can't tolerate someday, maybe you maybe me. You can say you love me a lot, but who knows when one day you really can't tolerate anymore. We can't predict things to happen or not. So i just hope to minimise our quarreling although i know i am always the one who find fault to argue about. My short and bad temper. Sometimes i know myself but i just don't want to admit wrong. Somehow because of you and your stupid attitude too. Ok just hope that we can carry on from now and ever. Be it 1 year 2 years 3 years or so on...... We will be together till everlasting. I dare not say forever cos i believe there is no forever. Anyway i've put in effort in this relationship, don't say i never ok.If i don't love you, i won't even shed a tears for you bcos you mean nothing to me, but you did make me cry so hard for you and only you ok. Lastly I love and i miss youuuuuu.............2 more days to book out........

I want your KISS your HUG your EYES on me and everything...
I JUST WANT TO SEE YOU!<3

You are the love of my life...
Our story begins on 15th August 2008
To..........
The End

The One And Only, no one else would ever replaced.

2009-06-08T21:40:00.001-07:00

BORED BORED BORED NO ONE AT HOME!!! ARGH!!!! HOW SIA!!

ROT ROT ROT.

3 MORE DAYS........FOR HIM TO BOOK OUT.....

1 MORE DAY.........STARTING NEW JOB NEW

COMPANY.....NERVOUS NERVOUS....

ANYWAY IT'S LUCKY TO HAVE JOB NOW! I HAVE TO TREASURE

IT NO MATTER HOW TOUGH OR HOW BORING IS IT.

PERSERVERE!!!!! I HOPE I CAN DO IT.

2009-06-08T08:39:00.000-07:00

Kinda boring after work. Thought today can work with dilah and joke last time with her who knows she never come! Damn it make me alone inside suffering. Never come still sms me ask me come today:( Hais nevermind my fate. Today is totally an UNLUCKY day for me. Wake up thinking whether wanna go work or not, couldn't make up my mind. Flipping here and there, finally think of going since today is my last day, maybe just go there and enjoy with colleagues. But only can see noor. The rest like angeline , sarah and mira all new comers so still not that close with them. Anyway i will miss noor, xana and dilah. YAYA why today i say is unlucky is COS when i was on my way to work nearer to COURTS, i saw 1 tiny white thing drop just right infront of me. I touch my hair, see my clothes, see my handbag, there is totally nothing. What i think to myself is HENG arh! nothing much. Then when i look down on my pants, WTF BIRDSHIT!!!!!! WAH LAU, at that moment i just feel like going home!!! Was thinking if i hadn't so hardworking to come workplace, i won't get this shit!!! But anyway just a few more steps to courts. So just drag all the way there-.- been dragging to work ever since. Somemore today sitting alone in call center, oh man dilahh!!!! your fault for not coming ok! haha! ok nevermind, today is my last day of working in courts after 11months going to 1 year. Hmm i think i will miss all my fellow colleagues there. I've been happy all the while ever since management changes. Forget it, it's already the past.

Today is Boyfriend's first day of reservist. I can't imagine life without him calling me and sms me. It's totally damn boring! It's not that he never sms or call, it's just that he's not as free to sms or call compare to work. Now he chat with me awhile and he have to go for training or outfield which i think is not possible for us to chat on the phone at all. Luckily he already finish his NS, if not we don't even have time together:( Aiya no matter what, for this 1 week he is safe can already. Hope nothing happens. BUT I AM FREAKING BORED~ 4 more days for him to book out........

2009-06-03T10:57:00.000-07:00

While waiting for the photo to be send finish, decided to post something today. Hehe.

Now is 1.58am in the morning, 4th June. Ya just a few hours ago, with ys the birthday girl, her bf and hy. At first i met up with hy 1st to go shopping for ys present. So difficult to choose her present sia. No idea what to buy for her too. So just went shopping around. Then saw this push cart, selling the photo thingy, kinda unique for a 21st birthday. Then saw this mirror and what flash thru my mind is that, hey i remember ys do need a mirror cos she just had her braces on! As she need to always check her teeth after eating to see any food stuck on her teeth! HAHAHA! So i decided to ask the lady to print a photo of her on the mirror. There's different kind of shaped and pattern of the mirror. But for her i think a simple square shaped mirror will do as she don't like those girly stuff. HAHA. So i bluetooth the nicest picture of her, smiling so sweet to the ladies computer to get her done with the pictures. Waited for 20mins and was done. Quite fast. Somemore is the most unique present ever right ys! No one would ever think of buying a mirror for a birthday!! Haha. Then i remember i left her birthday card at home!!! So i asked hy to accompany me home to take the card before going to meet her at clark quay. Went there eat fisherman warlf. Not bad the food. Hehe. After that went to a shop nearby the ally to play boardgame for 1 hour at $15 per table. The games still ok la. Help us to kill our time. Haha. Then went to the river side and took lotsa photo. Before going home, saw the angmoh ice cream, the one who always play tricks on others. $3 per cone. Nice man!!! Feeling just taste like chewy gums. Went to see people playing bungee and swing. Woo exciting. I WANNA TRY IT TOO! BUT TOO EXPENSIVE LAAAAAA!!!! Nevermind, after that went to take bus home with them. Home sweet home. Having a nice great fun day with you guys.

Update on 2nd June,

Meet my baby early in the morning at 930am, went prawning at bishan for 4hrs, total of $50 we spend for 10+ fresh prawns. Expensive eh. But money is not the concern. As long as we are having fun together, everything is worthwhile. At first when we started prawning, we keep catching prawn, wah so happy and excited for the 1st 2 hours. Then we went to extend for another 2 more hours, after that totally out of luck. Prawn eat our bait and run!!!! What the hell!!! At 1st while we keep catching, he is very excited and happy, but after that he totally lose his patients. HAHAHA! BINGO my friend guess correctly. LOL! But we made a promise that every month of our anniversary we would go there and prawn:) At the same time train up his patient. Hehe. After finishing the 4hours, due to the place kinda dirty and difficult to BBQ, we went to my place and decided to oven the prawn. I spread the butter on the pans, spread the bala chan chilli on the prawn. Peel for me the prawn and give me the biggest prawn to eat. Wooooooooo! SHOIK AND YUMMY!!!Thats our so called " Breakfast cum lunch". Totally never eat from morning till afternoon. Then we slack at my house till 6 plus and we decided to go to vivo to watch monster VS alien. But end up never watch due to alot of people. So he say, let's go eat the buffet steamboat. Wah lau stupid him tempt me lor. Dumb Dumb...... But still we go and eat... SHOIK ARH EAT TILL MY STOMACH BURST LIKE 3 MONTHS PREGNANT( THAT'S WHAT HE SAID) ! Hehe, but nevermind once a while. He peel the prawn and crab for me, he know i lazy=P.. Sweetie!Thanks Baby. Just feel so blissed with you around me. After that too full for our stomach then we went walk walk around before sitting on the bus going home. While in the bus, we keep tickling each other and laugh non-stop. It's been so long i never laugh with him till crazy already. I really treasure this day with him. It's the first time we been together for more than half the day gone, unlike previous day, keep on quarrel and argue non-stop. Thou it's not the quantity of time, it the quality of time spent together. I want more of this kind of life with you. Baby i love you. Muacks.

2009-06-01T10:48:00.000-07:00

有时侯真的想太多,太多...... feel like closing my eyes and sleep for the rest of my life.
No worries, no stress, no tiredness.
In life, you will gain something, but lose something eventually......
Sometimes life can be full of surprises.
Sometimes life can be full of misery.
Happiness, sadness, loneliness and sorts.
Each stages of life.
We have to go through.
Life, old , sickness , death , love...........
Love relationship, can be sweet, sour, bitter or even tasteless.
Depends how we build it.
Sweet in the beginning,
Sour in the middle,
Tasteless in the end.
Will that come true?
Hopefully not in my life........
Can say i optimistic.....

2009-05-29T11:59:00.000-07:00

All I want is happiness, purely from you,
can you give me?
Hope no more quarrels,
give and take alright?
I am short temper, you also, so we both work hard to change alright.
I am sure we can do it together.
Muacks i love ya baby ang.
Everlasting to our relationship.
Counting forward to our 10th month on 15th june<3
:)

2009-05-29T11:06:00.001-07:00

PROBLEMS PROBLEMS PROBLEMS PLEASE GO AWAY~!!@#$%%^&*

Everything was fine in the morning. But came to afternoon, problems all comes. Damn low mood today. While doing calling center, kinda free, so went in to facebook to have a look. Saw hauyee's graduation photo and decided to take alook what pictures she have upload. Then saw all the photos that we took on that day. Well, after finish seeing all those pictures, i so happen to think of my boyfriend facebook, cos didn't have the chance to take alook. So went in to see and kpo viewing his profile. Happen to see his so called " crush " last time and given him a comment, asking him to check digicam. Well, what flash through my mind is that, hmm..? is he still contacting her? My question. Then since was SMS-ing him at the same time, so i decided to ask to answer my queries. But out of my suprise, he actually gave attitude through the SMS at first and i didn't bother to reply. After which he call me on my mobile and " shouted " ( which he claims he did not cos he is in the arcade ). But even so he need to raise his voice, i don't find a need that he talk with some attitude from what i listen. I was like hey, i just asking you a simple question can't you just answer yes or no, no need to give attitdue unless you did something wrong. Is it that you still misses that girl or what? That's what i was thinking then. Was kinda angry and told him off. Asking him to call me some other times when both of us calm down and talk to me nicely if he wants to talk. He kept on calling and calling till i felt pissed off and decided to pick up the call. He immediate shout at me and we quarrel, saying he did not attitude and if i don't want to listen to his explaination or don't trust him, then fine. Wah i was like damn damn fucking pissed off man. AND WHAT'S MORE, HE TOLD ME IF I DON'T WANNA TALK FOREVER DON'T TALK. WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS. I don't even dare to say till like this and yet he told me this. Am i that worthless to you? That can let you say out this word so easily. Quarrel quarrel till wanna break off. Keep on crying till my eyes turn red. Noor saw me in toilet and asked me what happen. The minute she asked me, i totally cried my heart out to her. Anyway thanks to her for advising me. Everything sort out after that. Hauyee and yuanshan came all the way down to meet me just to accompany me. I am so touched by this 2 great buddies. When i am down, they are always there for me.

Thanks Noor, my best friend in my dept. Always my friend, not colleague. No matter what, you are always the one who comfort me, advise me and everything. You are the one that made me stay in Courts till now. I'll miss you when i leave. Today you hug me and cry makes me feel very blissed that you treasure our friendship. You are the first one to hug me and cry, really very touched. Muacks love you so much. Noor,Khatijah,Ayu,Xana. Great pals. I love them all.

Last but not least, My SISTER Missy Wong and BESTIE ys, Thanks for the company, you 2 are great pals! Love you guys too!BIG BIG KISS MUACKS!!!!

Anyway everything solved smoothly. The end!

2009-05-15T23:29:00.000-07:00

JOBS JOBS JOBS I REALLY IN NEED OF JOBS NOW!! I have tender my resignation letter on the 9th of May. I hope i won't regret doing this. Ya i did like this job but now, everything has changed. Management, especially Richard ( Fat Ass Director ), Jahabar ( Branch Manager ), office peoples, mushroom head ( Complain QUEEN ) and Evelyn ( Humji Manager ). Thou Jahabar never really do anything to me, but with all the rumours around makes me feel so stress. Yet now i am permanantly in Call Centre, which i can say, it totally SUCKS sitting on that wooden chair in a garang guni room, handling so much of calls and complains, being shout by customers, totally hate it and the chair Makes my back aching. Come back to the Richard, he is totally a SCROOGE! Everything CUT CUT CUT, CUT COST!!! Ya now the economic is bad, i understand that, we already working 44 hours instead of 40 hours compare to last time, and now we are not suppose to get any OT pay but claim hours. Somemore our hours claimed only on weekday and is OUR manager who CHOOSE for us when we can offset. WHAT IS THIS MAN! When you want us to work OT, you expect us to work on busy weekend, when come to payback of our OT or off day, you replace us with weekdays. Fucked up management ok. Now they are also implementing cashiering as our job. What the fuck__ If you think customer service is so free and easy, please come and sit with us. You can have the honour to sit the comfy chair. If you wanna increase our work load, please increase our pay as well. Now comes to our pretty mushroom hair girl or i should call her old virgin!! Keep thinking she's our boss, ordering us through the phone. Never pick up her call, she complain to our manager. Go and die. Now most crucial part thats my manager! If she's a good manager, i think i will still be staying in courts for good. IF ONLY she knows how to protect her staff, i won't be leaving. ALL HER FAULT!!! Ya i have to thank her for employing me for this job for working experience. If not for her, i won't have today. My 1 year of customer service skill. Is not that i wang en fu yi, if you are a good manager, i don't mind working for you all my life. But too bad, you never do it. Anyway it's over. BYE BYE COURTS.

Yesterday went for 2 jobs interview, after for so long i haven't been to any job interview. Kinda nervous. Went for the dental surgery assistant interview at orchard, have to mop the floor and clean the room and blood. Well have to reconsider. After which, went to UBI for data entry clerk interview, we are given 30mins to enter the data in microsoft excel and microsoft word. Have to type in chinese. Well well, seen the environment, kinda like it, but have to wait 1-2weeks for news if i am able to get the job. Monday going to Chinese Swimming Club for Front office Officer interview, hope will be a success one. After that will be NIKE as sales assistant. Hope will be a success one too. Quite unlucky yesterday, went buy bubble tea, the straw can't poke, end up everything splash onto my face, shirt and hair with CHOCOLATE! GRR!!After that meet him at J8 and he wanted to feed me the blackcurrent drinks, i thought he wants to disturb me so i push off the bottle and the drinks pour on my lips and skirt-.- what a screw up day:( Anyway, Hehe yesterday first time make up myself for job interview, not that perfect.

TA DA!!

Well although fail cos got smurge a bit, but my boyfriend encourage me and say pretty with make up:)quite happy for the word of encouragement. Yesterday after watching movie ( The Uninvited ), his friend SMS him ask him whether he wants to go for rounding. I was not quite happy with him because i always see him looks so tired and yet he wants to go out late at night with his bunch of friends for roundings. I rather he go home and rest than he go out late at night. Thou he says he seldom go out late at night nowadays, but true, i understand. It's not that i don't like you going out with your peers, if you want you can go out in the afternoon or morning then you will be back home at night 10 plus or 11 plus. I just don't really like you going out so late at night. Put yourselves into my shoes, if it was the other way round, my friends ask me go out late at night, how will you feel? don't tell me you will like it. Will you feel secure if i go out late at night? You will be worried am i right? If afternoon or morning it's alright you go with them, not that i wanna control you or i dislike your peers. Don't be mistaken. You still have your freedom to go out with your friends, but just make it less going out at night time. Afternoon or morning go ahead, i don't mind. I really hate night life guys. You want night life you go ahead, don't be my boyfriend. I don't need a nightlife boyfriend. I know the things that i said yesterday is somehow hurtful, but i comes with no choice. You are a good boyfriend, i know, honest with me and everything. I like it. Ok. Somehow i am still a very lousy girl. Difficult to please and things like that. Making your life damn miserable i guess? Anyway sorry for yesterday incident too. Hope we can quarrel less and happiness more. Thou yesterday is our 9th month anniversary. But i make it a fucked up day for you..........

Pictures to update......

WONG HAU YEE

MY FOREVER BESTIE

CUM

2009-04-25T10:47:00.000-07:00

I am damn damn moody now. Wanted to write all my feelings that i can't express here. Actually 2 more days and i am able to go to genting with my love one. But he's sick at the moment and we decided to cancel our trip.

Yesterday he called me and tell me that let's cancel our trip as he is feeling worse and worse. My tears straight drop down. Maybe cos of my huge disppointment, therefore my tears keep rolling down. I try to control my emotion, but it just can't be helped. I was all alone in call centre as khatijah and amme is out of that office at the moment. I cried and cried while talking with him but i try not to let him know that i was crying. Soon after we hang up our phone. At that point of time, i was in great disppointment and some anger. Why all this things have to happen just before our genting trip. After that i send him a sms telling him how disppointed i am and when he call and tell me we don't cancel it and we still proceed to our trip. But my mood is all gone and i throw my tantrum at him. Quarrelling with him. Actually i am angry with him not because that he wants to cancel the trip, it's because that Wed he is already not feeling well and i did ask him to consult doctor and take MC for Thursday but he insist he's fine and went to work for Thursday. In my heart i was thinking, he can work so hard until he is sick and not willing to go on MC, but when comes to tour, he wants to cancel and rest at home. Meaning that working to him is much more important compare to me as he can easily give up on this trip which makes me feel so upset, angry and disppointed. This is where i feel so angry towards him yesterday without even considering how serious is his sickness and makes me don't seems like i am caring and concerning about him. He might think that i am cold blooded and doesn't care about him at all, But in actual facts i am concern about him at all times. If Wed he did listen to me and took his MC on thurs i won't mind him cancel his trip cos i know he is seriously sick. Yesterday what i talk to him is way too hurtful. Cos i am still angry with him for not listening to me to take his MC and wanna cancel the trip. I told him to pass me all the documents and i can go with other friend. He said no, if 1 never go, both also don't go. I say i don't care give me ALL. He then asked me who i wanna go with, i say no need him to care. After that he said FINE don't acknowledge him as my boyfriend, he will pass me everything. Hangs up. I know the way i talk to him is damn harsh just to throw tantrum at a sickly person like him. This time round i am really at fault. I wanna show care and concern but in a wrong way. Put myself into his shoe, if i am the 1 sick and wants to cancel the trip, and he says nvm he goes with his friend, i also will feel pissed off. But i am only using this to vent anger and not seriously will go with my friend alone without him.

Today went to his house to visit him, he's really damn sick, keep vomiting, diarreoh, fever, coughing. Seeing him in this manner makes me heart pain. And thinking back of everything i did the day before, showing attitude, throwing tantrum.... i really feel that i am not a good girlfriend. Only know how to show attitude when people is really sick. I think if it were to be other way round, i am the 1 who fall sick, i think he will understand me and take pretty good care of me. My main purpose today is to take care of him, but i am good for nothing, i only can do nothing there. No help at all, really felt so useless. The only thing i can do is sit beside him and watch him sleep. After that i asked him to bath and will feel better but his mum doesn't allow this and that, so i have nothing to say but to keep quiet in case i say something wrong again. Maybe because of his mum is consider more to those old modern. Unlike my parents. Gap difference. So his mum was the only 1 taking care of him. I left his place around 7 plus and went to meet hy and jr. Watch HANDSOME SUIT. Nice show anyway. Finish show at around 1205am and we took bus 80 home as there's no more train. Chatting in bus with hy. About him and jr. I keep express all my troubles to her. Keep thinking and thinking in bus. Really felt so miserable. I think that he can find a better ladies with good figures and pretty faces with good personality. I am a disppointment to him. I don't wish to drag him any longer. I not fit to be his girlfriend and i am a lousy person. I have no more assurance in this relationship because of my stupid behaviour and attitude. Thou he treat me well, but it won't last because of me..That's all i can say. Last of all i am really sorry.

2009-04-19T06:57:00.000-07:00

GOOD FRIDAY~

Update on good friday, went to suntec with hy and ys. As usual, chit chat and play arcade basketball. Always having fun with them. Heh. We sit down at the "MY PLAYGROUND" there and chit chat cos there are chairs for us to sit down. Talk talk talk about our school days in primary and secondary school all the way till almost 9pm then we went home as hy is working morning shift the next day. Theirs school time is much more interesting than mine cos during primary school i was quite a anti-social person. HAHAHA!!After which we went down to suntec convention centre and took bus 133 cos i am going to AMK to meet my boyfriend, and hy drop off the same stop as ys at boon keng 1st as the bus is freaking cold. Haha. After that i took the bus all the way to AMK and meet him there. We watch the sniper, by edison and some hk actors. Not a bad show. After that he sent me home and that's the end of my day:)

16TH March

Boyfriend came to my house and fetch me. He bought a EVERLAST bag for me! I thought he buy for me accessories because the day before he told me to wear to work and out with him. Naturaly when people see the word "WEAR", of cos is something that i could wear. How to wear a bag? LOL. Anyway the bag is way too big to bring out for normal shopping and work. Hehe but thanks dear anyway. I love it. Afterward, Went to Sun Plaza to purchase our tickets to Malaysia, GENTING!!!WEEEEE! After so long staying in Singapore, finally got the chance to go out of this country. My last visit to Malaysia was 2003. Been 6 YEARS i never went overseas. Took my annual leave for 1 day. We went for a 3 days 2 nights trip:) so happy that i can travel with him. First time going overseas without my parents. Kinda excited. But i am sure he will take very good care of me. So i don't have to worry. I'll be going away on the 27th-29th. After working for nearly 1 year, finally i can relax! 1 more week to go~ lalala!! After we purchase our tickets for our genting trip, we went to orchard to catch a movie call 17 AGAIN. Nice show too. Sweet. Ate donut in the cinema as i am craving for it. HAHA suddenly just feel like eating chocolate donut=p Finish movie, went to suntec to eat his SHI LIN Chicken and i eat the oyster mee sua. OOOOO NICE! hehe but was too full to eat. Went to fountain there, sit at the chair chit chat till near 1030 we took bus 70 home. Darling i enjoy my day with you!

TODAY

My mum's birthday today. Fork out 50 bucks to treat her eat fish steamboat and some other dishes. Total of 65 bucks. My dad paid the balance. Hehe. Nice food. Went to bugis shopping for clothes. My dad bought 3 shirts for me! hehe so nice of him! As for my bro, he damn blood sucker, ask my dad to buy for him 1 chelsea jersey from ADIDAS. 80+ bucks. Damn don't know how to earn money know how to spend money only. What to do, my dad still buy for him. Too generous already. Haha! My dad just dote us too much. :) After that i saw bubble tea, feel like drinking chocolate ice blend. So i asked my dad what flavour he wants also. He say he wants the durian milkshake. So i took out my wallet, wanna treat him drink. But suddenly he just took out 10 bucks from his wallet and pay for me. Aww such a nice dad where to find! That's why i respect and love him so much. Thanks dad. Everything done, and we went home. Now i feeling quite tired already. Haha no work also tired. No choice. Not enough sleep. Anyway gotta end here. Tata!

Will upload pictures again!

2009-04-07T04:40:00.000-07:00

4TH OF MARCH

Boring boring BORING!~ what a boring day! half the day at home slack. OH MAN! luckily around 5, mum called and asked me whether i wanna go my grandma house to eat dinner or not. I consider for awhile, then i said ok. Then i text hy, whether she wanna meet me at AMK Hub at night after her dating with JUNRONG. Her "so called" going to be boyfriend, as from what i see, it's the matter of time! HEHE. I text my boyfriend too, and asked him whether wanna meet me after his work cos i thought hy will be going off around 10 plus and by the time he reach, they might already left. But hy told me that she will only go air port to meet her mum at 11 plus. So nevermind anyway he wanna come meet me^__^ ok then i met ys at AMK 1st, i went bought a cardigan from THISFASHION. WOO quite nice. hehe, and i head down to meet her at AMK Hub. We buy bubble tea and chit chat while waiting for that princess to come. Then after that we went to S11 to have their dinner. Ys buy fish and chips whereas hy bought satay. I eat 2 sticks of satay as i am quite full. Finish our dinner we went to jubilee to play arcade. Our all time favourite BASKETBALL again! Waste quite alot of money on that. Actually we play solo, but then it's way too tiring. And we think of a tactics. So we divide ourselves into 3. Each of us take 1 stage. At 1st ys is not so good at it. But end up finally she got the hand of it. And keep scoring. All thanks to her in order for us to go all the way to stage 4. HEHE! Play till really sweat alot. Suddenly my boyfriend suddenly appeared and carry me up. Give me a shocked man! Then he also start to play a few match of bball. His score always so damn sucks! HAHA! Played awhile more then the already going 11. So decided to send hy and ys to their bus stop but my boyfriend wanna send me home so he say let's go home with them together also. Anyway it's fine with me. But never did we expect the bus in AMK end so early. 1130 and the last bus for 24 left. End up hy get scolded by her dad for not keeping track of the time and she didn't get to the airport to fetch her mum. So we took 853 to my house and she change to bus 43 and go home. Since it's late so my boyfriend straight go home from AMK and not to trouble him. Thanks for coming to accompany me all.

6TH OF MARCH

Went jurong point to walk with my boyfriend. Since we can't think of anywhere to go. Hehe. Anyway been few years i never been to JP. Now it become much more bigger with the extention. Slowly walk walk around. Then we went to buy movie tickets for the JACKY CHAN show. WOW damn nice leh! 5 stars for it. 1st time see this kind of action show that makes me intrested. Before that we went arcade to play bball also. Not that fun as the ball all very bouncy. So decided to play car racing. BOO i win him! hehe!=P Ok finish the show, went to walk around NTUC Xtra. Shop shop inside and went to the fish section. The live prawns jump and some of the water splash onto him. Then i ask him to go the basin there to wash his hand. He spit the saliva out into the basin and there's this uncle say him, cannot anyhow spit on the basin. Then he say back, cos your prawn splash water on me. Then there's a few people looking at them. I felt abit embarrass as none of my cliques would ever dare to say like this. Then i disturb him and say him very guai lan. Haha anyway just joking with him about him making me paiseh. Then he can start to nag all the way. Till we reach kopitiam. Then we say till the topic again and i asked him don't say anymore so i just say okok and cover his mouth. He keep on talking and i just walk away covering my ears. Suddenly he just flare up on me. So he just sit down and i follow him sit down. Talk to him nicely but he still give me face. So i also angry. Say finish and i just kept quiet. Both of us keep quiet and he suddenly just grab my hand and talk to me again. I just don't wanna talk to him so i face away. Suddenly don't know why i just lean my head on the table and just cried. He keep force me to look at him but i just refuse. He said ok la don't want look at me then don't look la. Later he got angry again and just use his strength and force me up. Quite stunned. After awhile talking to me, i finally cool down. He got the ability to make me flare up and cool down easily=P.. Nevermind past already so forget it. Went to have our dinner and play bball again at zone X. After he went to my house and we sit in my room and chit chat awhile and he went home around 11 plus. Send him down to bus stop, he went 7-11 and buy his drink and he bought mini cornetto for me. So sweet of him^__^! Waited for awhile and he got up his bus. Anyway i enjoy every moments with him although we will have some arguements and quarrels, but things can be solved. Muacks i love you.

As for today, it's my colleague Brenda's last day of work. She will be leaving today. So colleagues shared money amoung each other to buy her a cake as a farewell gift. Anyway Brenda you take care and all the best in your future path. Pictures we took today!

2009-04-03T09:57:00.000-07:00

Playing Jump Shot.
Muacks!

Eat my Head

Gek SAI

Stupid pose.Hehe

SEXY!

PANDA BISCUIT SO CUTE

In Omni Threater

Outside Science Centre

Hehe yesterday met hy at my blk downstair and we took bus 105 all the way from serangoon to jurong. Wah lau long journey la. Took us about 1 and 1/2 hours. Guess what, we wear the same color T-shirt and the same JEANS material bottoms, only i wear skirt she wear pants. Like twin-.- so damn paiseh!! Haha. My butt felt so numb when in the bus. When passing by commonwealth, saw a road accident. A pool of blood on the road, bike landed on the floor,damaged. Can't see any casualties. Maybe dead or back to hospital. Such a bad scene. Hmm then reach jurong interchange, went to a accessories shop to shop for hair clips, then saw earring and toe ring and also hairclip. So i bought it. Went IMM to shop. WOW so long never been there. So much changes and so nice. Many foods and shops. But cos we planned to eat SAKURA buffet so we never eat. Shop for awhile, went to take bus 335 to science centre and went to our omni threater. Watch the SEA MONSTER. Quite nice. After finish watching, i went to take my height and weight using the machines, weight= 63.1kg, height= 162.3cm. OVERWEIGHT!Nevermind, then we went in ear our sakura buffet. AWWWWW SO NICE THE FOOOOOODDDDD ESPECIALLY THE DURIAN I CAN KEEP SCOOP AND EAT!!!! YUMMMMY!!!!!!salmon unagi tempura chicken chop satay prawn cakes alot alot more!!! WOOOOO I WANNA GO AGAIN! i think next time=P Me and her enjoy all the way especially the DURIAN!!! eat till our stomach BLOATED!!! HAPPY HAPPY! so long never eat till so SHIOK! Ok after that we went to toilet take lots of stupid pictures and cam whoring. hohoho! slack outside science centre awhile and went home taking MRT. Spend lots of money today:( but nevermind since i am happy^__^V

ok post some stupid and nice pictures=P on top

About today, saw a girl so fat and yet wear such a SHORT HOT PANT like no need to wear already la. Butt coming out. Wee o WEE. Can wear pantie better. Squeeze till the flesh all come out. EEEYER!

2009-03-31T06:06:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow is April Fool's Day, so this joke just come straight to my mind. While on the way home towards the bus stop, decided to message him to disturb him, saying :" I think let's break up...:(
then space all the way down and write HAPPY ADVANCE APRIL FOOL!". I knew that he won't scroll all the way down cos most of the people won't scroll down their message if they can't see anything below and wouldn't know there's still some message right in the bottom. I waited and waited for him to call me or message me but not even a single respond. At the moment, i was thinking he doesn't even care about me at all as for normal reaction of guys seeing this kind of messages will straight away call their girlfriend. Somehow abit sad as i was keep waiting for his call and i wanted to listen to his reaction. Then end up lose my patient in waiting so just throw my phone aside in my room and silent it. Play game to pass my time. I was thinking if he saw this message and does not do anything about it, then i also nothing to say already. Then i will know i don't worth much in his heart:( But guess what, i play finish my audition and wants to check if he did call me anot, WOW 13 missed call and 1 message. HAHAHA! then i pick up wanna laugh, WAH he sound so angry, and says " you think it's fun is it? why you wanna say break up?HUH!..." hahaha really can make me laugh. Then i asked him to scroll down his sms to see the last sentence. He hang up the phone and see the sms and call me back again. HAHA saying that his balls nearly fly out. LOL!! upon receiving his call, at least i felt something that he really treasure me=P

baby i GOTTCHA!!=Pp
Darling if you did nothing wrong, i won't throw you aside ok!unless you did something which i find it unforgivable then i will say this word. I won't carry this word in my mouth anyhow unless i mean it. But today is just disturbing you. =P
Don't worry^___^V yeah!April Fool Success!

2009-03-30T09:12:00.000-07:00

29th March

Meet hy 230pm at my house bus stop and went to bugis to shop for bag and bras. Hehe. Walk round and round bugis street, actually wanted to buy shoulder bag, the one like Myphosis bag, netted transparent. But my ys friend already got it, so i don't want to buy the same one. So just shop around then went into 1 shop and buy shirt since my shirt very limited. After finish buying my clothes, i shop for my bag again and saw this sling transparent bag. Kinda unique as i never see people bring transparent sling bag before. So decided to buy as it's not that expensive too. After that went to Bugis Junction BHG to shop for bras. My colleagues give me advice to buy better bra so that it could last longer and have more support for the breast. So no choice gotta buy better bras since my bras only have limited too. Well it's difficult to get my bra size so only better brands will have my size. I bought 2 Triumph Bras at $49.90, haiz $50 gone like this. In that day almost spent $100 in a day. OH MY GOSH! $$$$$ FLY~~~ nevermind. Shop finish bugis and we went to dohby ghaut and shop while waiting for our long lost contact secondary classmates. Total there's 8 of us meeting. Had our dinner at JustAcia and lots of chit chat. Around 10 plus, some claim that they are tired already as next day some have to work and some have to study. So we took MRT and head back home. All go separate ways and left joanna and me. My secondary BEST Friend and we did actually lose contact for very long although we live so near. To my suprise, we still have so much things to talk like we used to before. So we sit down at our nearby coffee shop and have a drink and chit chat till 12plus and we went home. Her boyfriend keep calling her and ask her where she is and sorts. Such a nice and caring boyfriend she has. End up her boyfriend drive down from hougang to find her. So sweet~ How i wish my boyfriend also will come down to find me XD. Haha kidding, people with license and car and people without license and car is different. With license and car of cos he will come down find his girlfriend. And i am sure that when he got his license and car, he will come down and look for me too. So i understand his situation now as he also live quite far distance from me:) Ok i will stop here for this day.

30th March

Met my sweety boy at my place too. Waited for me at ground floor 2pm sharp whereas i still preparing myself to go out. Hehe. Sorry lor everytime you have to wait for me=p. Today he skipped lesson again just to accompany me. So sweet of him too. So we took a cab down to barker road to look for his MDIS classmate who is working there so he could ask her to hand in his assignment for him. After which we went to far east and walk walk. Eat his SHI LIN again. His all time favourite. After which we walk at orchard and head to cineleisure to catch out HOTEL FOR DOGS. Quite and nice and touching show. Not bad! Before movies, we played in the arcade, basketball, time crisis 4 and he played his INITIAL D 5 again. Stupid game addict. Cos movie starting at 7pm, we went to have our dinner at KOUFU first. I ordered my TomYum fish noodle. Wooo, damn spicy and hot. But nice. Cos i am still quite full, i can't finish the noodle and soup. He ordered his mee with soup. His mee so much like pig eat. Haha! Movie finish, we walk all the way to dohby ghaut and shop around. Reach dohby guess what. SAW HAZEL! Haha nothing much change in her only her hairstyle. Haha miss her so much. Anyway just a short conversation and she went off with her friends and we continue our walk. Went carrefour and he bought ben & jerry chocolate cookie ice cream to eat. Mmm~~ yum yum nice. Slack awhile and went home. Anyway have lotsa fun with you. Really enjoyed the day. =) Thanks^__^

2009-03-26T08:50:00.000-07:00

WOW a damn damn tiring day but a happy day with him:) Start from yesterday, 25th march 09. Off work at 2pm due to 4hours of time off set. Hehe, after his job interview, he come all the way to my workplace to find me. So sweet of him. Anyway, everytime meet him, just felt happy, cos the time that we spend together is very little. Have to understand that. But really glad and happy that he put in effort to come all the way to my workplace to find me instead of asking me to meet him else where. After work, take cab went down to sun tec to have our lunch and went marina to watch witch mountain. Quite a nice show anyway. He planned not to go school again and accompany me for the day. But i've already asked my mum to cook my dinner the day before. So i asked him to go school and need not accompany me. Thanks dear for all your effort that makes me so touched.

Ok then back to today. Wake up early in the morning 840am cos i have my Final Theory Test at 1030am. He say he will wake me up at 830am but didn't and he says that he wants to let me rest more as i keep complain tired. So sweet la you ok. Then i take bus reach there was around 1025am. When i reach SSDC, people inside already started taking their test. At first i told him to go off first without me, but he says if i can't make it in time he rather don't take too and would rather wait for me. Oh man, when i saw this sms, i was quite surprise and shocked that he will say out this kind of things. But i am glad that i have him with me and put me in his first priority. Haha but nevermind, reach there still can take our test. Was quite nervous. But the question that came out was quite easy. So i do it confidently. Saw the person beside me went off and i take a peep at his result. PASSED! Now makes me more nervous. So i faster do finish. Then i end test confidently, PASSED! WOO YEAH! Then i go out of the room, he already finish his test. He looks at my face and he says, you also same arh? Then i thought he passed, then i say what same? your pass or fail, he says fail. Then i happily say i PASSED! HAHAHA! He seem so surprise=P So i keep tease him, lalalala! Anyway darling don't worry i wait for you and we take practical together ok. You always waited for me, so now is my turn to wait for you. Ok then after that we went to Orchard and shop. Then after that he told me he wanna buy pants, so i suggest that we go to bugis as there's much more varieties and cheaper. So went there and he got his pants. Not bad la. After that we went to vivo to watch the unborn. Not so nice. Don't even know what the show is showing. Hais nevermind forget it. As long as i get to enjoy the movie with him i am contented enough. After finish watching, we went to eat our MALA steamboat. Quite nice and filling. Eat till my stomach going to bloated. He keep giving me all the food and he ate so little. Want to feed me into fat pig is it. Especially the crab claw. Keep giving me the biggest and he eat those small crab with little meat only. I just love him dote me so much! But can be recommanded for people to try, the chicken soup is nice. Spend this whole 2 days with him. Tired but happy. After dinner went to walk for better digestion, then went to the top to sit and chat. He likes to kiss me but his eyeball don't know fly to where which i find it like, hey you are kissing me yet your eyes don't know fly where, keep looking left or right, to me is like no manners. You wanna kiss me then don't keep look around. I find it so weird when your mouth is stick to me but your eyes isn't with me. So i think whats the point for kissing me when your eyes is looking at passer by or don't know what la. Anyway forget it, already passed. But i still enjoy the day with you ok.

Baby, just wanna tell you something. Everytime outside when you kissed me on my mouth i always tend to back off is because that i feel awkward when a lot of people out there. I know i shouldn't care how people looking at us, but cos is public so i prefer to behave properly. Not that i don't love you. I don't mind you kiss me when there's not so much people or in private. But still i enjoy you kissing me ok. Hope you will understand ok. LOVE YOU SO MUCH OK!:)

2009-03-20T00:23:00.000-07:00

PHEWWWW~ finally my OFF day again! Hurray! Got time to blog again. If not don't know when i can blog. Hmm, well went for our COURTS staff conference today and it falls on my off day,what the hell. Oh man~ damn boring. Reach there 7.55am going 8am. Was told that the meeting start at 8am, but end up, it is 830am. Make me waste my trip on a stupid cab!!!! Cost me 12 bucks. Damn it, i can jolly well use that money on my food and other things. Because of my manager told me not to be late and i wake up around 7am, no time to take bus already, SOOO....... DAMN IT!!! Ok well forget it, after finish the boring staff conference, took a bus went to kovan, a salon called Mystique and rebond my hair. The rebonding doesn't seem that well compare to my first rebonding. Both are soft rebonding but i don't know why this isn't that great. Anyway tried once and i will never go back there again to rebond my hair. My hairstylist is a china guy, he says that my hair isn't nice cos not much of layers. So he trim abit for me for the side hair and back hair. But looks ok anyway. For my fringe, i asked him to trim for me a slant from side, end up become KUKU hair like a girl working same company as me. Damn! but nevermind i think mine is still much more better as there is a slight slant better than totally straight cut. Here is the picture of my KUKU hair and my KUKU face. HAHAHAHA!!!

Back to Monday which falls on the 16TH March, after our anniversary day, we went to Singapore ZOO together to visit his "friends and relatives". Mainly the AHMENGS and BABOONS! HAHA!! went there eat chicken rice, crystal bao nuggets and chips. Damn expensive. No choice is a tourist attractions. See lots of animals, but i think i enjoy watching the polar bear swim. WOW the feet just infront of me at the glass, so biggggg. The polar bear was enjoying swimming and playing with the container provided. How i wish i can have this kind of life=p We walk and walk, it's a raining day. A crew lend us his umbrella and we shelter to the kids playing area. We bought a poncho or what i can't remember the correct name for it and wear it so we can walk freely in the rain without getting wet. WOW so romantic horrrr. Here's some photo that we took while in the ZOO.

White Tiger

Proud Big BIRD
Chicken and ME

2 Monkeys behind us

His and MY FAVOURITE BABOON

Penguine

Giraffe and my poncho

Lion And Lioness

Fatty and Nerdy him. HAHA!!=P

SCREAM Part 4? By ANG GUAN NAM

Ok after Zoo, went to The Cathay to catch the COMING SOON. To my surprise, it's not that scary at all. CHEY NO KICK. Unlike him, keep squeezing his eyes small small or close his ears. HAHA so cute everytime see him like that i just feel more humour than horror. HAHA! After watching movie, we went to sun tec to walk and sit down chit chat. Due to his parents quarrel he's been very stress about it. Anyway don't worry ok, everything will be fine. Remember i am always by your side. No matter whatever things, just tell me and i will be your listening ears. Anyway thanks for keeping me company for the day. Skipped your lesson just to accompany me, felt so touched but you need to study hard too.

Update on Sunday 15TH March IT Show

Previous day went to IT Show at SunTec conventional hall. Took bus 70, stand for the whole journey. Hy got seat to sit. So when the malay guy got down from the bus beside her, she ask my to come in and sit with her. But 1 stupid aunty, infront of me, just squeeze and sit down. I was like WHAT THE FUCK! Nevermind then, when reach the convention hall, WAH LAU full of people. Somehow makes me damn frustrated and pissed. Keep being pushed and squeezed. Hate it man. Went out with hy,jr,ys,wd. 2 couples which makes me the extra one. Feel kinda awkward. Cos hy keep accompanying jr even though they are not even couple yet. Felt so left out. For ys of cos she will accompany her boyfriend. That goes without saying. Hmm then while walking in the IT show, ys and wd separate from us. So they went out to Subway and have their lunch. So the 3 of us keep walking and shop for her MP3. Walk walk walk, one stupid guy step on my slipper and don't wanna let go. I keep pulling and pulling until i was so pissed, i just turn back and shout, EH HELLO MY SLIPPER! and i pointed at my slipper. Not even a single sorry from him. STUPID DUMB BELL. Then after awhile i told them, my neck very stiff and wanted to go out and rest, so i waited outside for them. Then i called up ys to ask where are they. After that i went to subway to look for them. We shop for af present 1st at NUM. After hy finish shopping her IT Show, she came and look for us. Then we head to hy's house. Wanted to take MRT but packed full with people, can't even move. So decided to take bus. Waited for so long, so many people yet not even a single bus. I became more and more impatient. Decided to take cab. Guess what. When i flag the cab, that stupid bangala just dash out and open the front door and just sit inside, never even allow the passenger to step out. So no manners. Now finally i know why indian come from bangaladash, cos bangala DASH !stupid!! nevermind, i waited for another cab. While waiting for the passenger to come out, i waited outside the door, raining so heavily, then ys said, if i can't get this cab i can chop off my head as the cab is just infront of me. Out of my surprise, 1 stupid china man come dashing out and open the front door of the cab again. Wanted to hop in. Now he makes me more furious. So i shouted at him, EH EXCUSE ME THIS CAB I FLAG FIRST OK! This is my first time i use this kind of tone talk to stranger. Hy and ys claims that i am fierce but to me i think i am still quite polite to him cos i did say EXCUSE ME. I can see that he's quite shocked and he said sorry sorry. Whatever la these few bunch of idiots. SPOILT my whole day. Went her house slack whole day=P

Ok i will end here. Going out with hy later and to ys house at night. ^_^

2009-03-11T09:03:00.001-07:00

Wake up early in the morning around 11 plus near 12. Cos going to my sista hy house. Hehe.Ask me to call her once i wake up. So i called her up around 1230, told her that i feel like buying shoe for work since i haven't buy any yet. We went hougang mall to shop, but no luck too. So she suggest that we go out to the hougang central to see have or not. We pass by one shop, lotsa shoes but just don't have that kind of shoe that i want. So i never give up and we walk further down to see. Pass by a shop where people sell all the bakery things, so she went to buy her pearls. Haha. Then we walk down the street after she buy. Then found one small shop, sell shoes. To my surprise, i saw the kind of shoe that i always wanted. Comfy and nice. So tried and i bought it:) yeah ^^V. After that went to sengkang and back to her house. We chit chat as usual.

Till 530 like that, my boyfriend called. Saying that he had left his workplace. So he's on his way down to find me at sengkang. So i left hy's house and took a bus to compass point to meet up with him. We went Plaza Sing to watch movies, but the movies doesn't suit us. So we decided to walk down to the cathay to see got what movies there. But also, none of the movies suits us. But we can get our tickets for the kung fu chef at The Cineleisure. Took cab down from The Cathay, when hop on the cab, WOW $2.80 plus another extra charges $4, so expensive! Anyway we are rushing for the movies, so ya. Finish movie, we eat long john for our dinner. Woo damn filling. Walked out of cineleisure after that, a girl passed by and my boyfriend told me, wow her boobs very big and pretty. Then i was like -.- people see face you see where? Pervert old man! Haha but guys is like this, it's their human nature, so as long as they never do wrong things behind their girlfriend, this kind of things is nothing. Then i play with him, don't allow him to touch me. After awhile, while walking towards the MRT, he suddenly pissed off and give me that kind of faces and scold me. I was like what the fuck? He told me that people behind is gossiping about us blah blah blah. So he felt embarassed that i keep pushing him away like as if we are like friends instead of couple. I told him, people want to say what let them say it's none of our business ok! I really can't stand people giving me attitude and faces, scold me or what. I felt really pissed off when he did that. So i was like WHATEVER LA! Ask him to pass me all my things but he didn't. We went down the escalator to the MRT station, after that he walk a few distance down and wanna exit the MRT station from the escalator. So i just walk straight up to the MRT control station, not wanting to follow him. Was so pissed. But i can't go anywhere without my wallet, phone and ez-link, which are all with him. So i just stand outside the MRT control station. Just awhile he came up to me and said sorry. After that i cried, cos he shouted at me and then after say sorry to me. Just too pissed till cry. So long i haven't cry infront of people. Hais. Nevermind since he already apologise, i don't wanna make things difficult for the both of us. We are both mature enough to handle this kind of things. Sometimes i just felt that he pampered me too much. But sometimes, he really too hot tempered. Which i feel that he should change abit. Anyway i appreciate that he make an effort to spend time with me. I don't wanna quarrel with him too. But sometimes quarrel can't be avoided with his kind of temper! Ok anyway enough of this, boy i treasure every min sec with you. So please change your temper.

2009-03-09T19:50:00.000-07:00

Kinda long never post again. Haha. Anyway last saturday went out with hy to bugis to buy my skinny jeans for work. Haha finally got it. Cost me 30 bucks. Not cheap somemore i have to bring it for alteration. Since my leg short, no choice. Went to shop for my working shoes also, but too bad, no luck. Don't have the shoes that i want. Nevermind, after that went to sun tec and shop. Guess what, while waiting at the bus stop, i saw 1 TRANSEXUAL lady. From a male to a female. OH MY GOD, the face was like totally a man! But the FIGURE, WOWWWWWWW DAMN NICE!How i wish i got such a nice figure like "her". Haha but i don't have to admire people figure or what, i am happy of what i am now. Have to be satisfied in myself right! Ok then reach sun tec, got career fair, damn lots of people registering. Haha, i feel like going to join groupier when casino open. But my mental calculation sucks. Heard from Max that we need to be good in our mathematics in order to work in that line. Cos you need to see the cards and know how much is it. Damn it. But i like gambling:( Nevermind wait till then, see how again. Hy and me went to arcade to play basketball, haha play till my hand very tired. Later on, jun rong, hy's "boyfriend" came down to find us and give hy a shock by a tap on her back. HAHA i thought what happen. Almost time for the E-Entertainment concert so we walk down to marina and i have my long john there. The 2 of them watched me eat. Hehe. When reach the place, wow damn crowded. While queueing up, waiting for ys and her friend pei hua. We already reach the 1st queue yet they haven't come, so we just stop there and let the rest of the people in 1st. Guess what, they reach and they don't dare to cut into the queue, so i went forward and shouted, hey your tickets is with us and bring them in. So CLEVER of me!^___^ LOL! seated down and watch the performance. Got some few popular celebrities. Anyway not bad. Was told that the concert will end around 10pm. But drag till almost 11pm. So i left the place 1030 as i am meeting him. Don't want to make him wait for me so long. Reached AMK HUB, told him i am very hungry, we went MAC to eat my nuggets! hehe thank you darling. After that watch PUSH. Not a bad show. So far this action show i finds it not bad. Ok anyway pig, i appreciate you meet me after your work though we have some misunderstanding between the 2 of us previously. Haha. Ok end here.
BYE.

2009-03-03T07:03:00.000-08:00

27th of Feb

Quite sometime didn't really update my blog, so now i just write 1 whole shot. hehe. On this date, went out with my besties hy and ys to sentosa for sun tan. But the weather this few days is not that good. Not sunny at all. Can't even get tanned. Just abit red around my chest area. Other than that is nothing. Played frisbee, and that ys play till so rough push me fall down :( After that we play with sands while hy is talking to her "so-called" boyfriend. HAHA SCANDAL!While she talking, we went to buried her frisbee and told her it's gone! HAHA! She really believe us, cos our acting skill is so damn pro. HEHE! Went to bath during evening time, feel so sweaty. Went back to vivo to search for my BRAS! but no luck. Well after that we went to ys house to eat dinner. OH MY GOD MAN! HER MUM'S COOKING IS SO DAMN DAMN NICE I REALLY ENJOY THE MEAL! Slack till almost 11 plus then take MRT back home. A wonderful day indeed.

28TH of Feb

Working morning shift today, went to meet him at his workplace. Been 1 week i never even met him. Reach causeway, still early since it's only 8 o'clock, then went to eat my dinner alone since i am damn damn hungry. The food court was damn pack, i buy food still have to think whether there is place for me to sit anot. Bought my black pepper chicken chop, saw 1 uncle sitting alone therefore went forward to ask him can sit together anot. Then he ask me chicken chop you buy from here is it?-.- of cos la if not from where? haha! stupid question. Finish eating then went walk walk around to shop for my BRA!Went to metro then saw lots of BRAS ~.~ some real damn nice, but no size for me-.- sadded. Actually wanted to buy Triumph, but it's TOO EX! 1 BRA cost more than 70 bucks. OH MY GOD! then after scroll awhile saw this bra very nice. A aunty approach me. Then i ask her this bra got my size? She measure for me and then say, hmmm your 1 too big. Need bigger cup. After that she show me the cup very big, CUP D! wow! hais but not nice the pattern. This cost 40+ bucks and after that she asked me to get another 1 for 50% discount for the 2nd piece. Then i choose another 1 which is even bigger cup. Cup E. NOT NICE ALSO! But no choice. This time round this cost 50+ bucks. OH MY..... But have to buy. The brand sorella is a good brand so i don't mind spending it more on this bra. Went in to the fitting room to try and try the different sizes, think took me more than half an hour just to fit the bra and get the correct size. Yawnz! hate trying bras! hehe. ok after finish buying and sorts.Still got time so i loiter around the place and call hy and ask her chat with me. But she with her "so-called" boyfriend mah. Then don't disturb her. After that met him, and saw the promoter girl who is interested in him, hahaha! so damn funny. But seriously she is not that bad like what u describe to me OK! We went to watch The Bloody Valentine. My god, so damn nice and that ah gua beside me keep using his hand to cover his eyes. HAIS! Why you so ahgua!! hehehe!anyway 4.5 stars to the movie. Reccommanded. After that send me home and he went home too.

2nd of March

Ok went out with him to the SINGAPORE FLYERS! wee so nice of him to bring me to sit the flyers. Although it's nothing much. Once is enough. We went marina 1st, ate the durian puff, ohhhhh myyyyyy godddddd, delicious! even precious 1st time say durian nice! HAHAHA! Went in the flyers, like checkpoint still have to scan our bag and stuff. They took pictures for us, and the photo cost $18. Although it's nice, it's too ex. Not to waste his money, i rather don't want it. The flyers last us for around half an hour. Really slow moving. Heh but enjoy it with YOOU! Hope you enjoy the day with me too. After that went to sun tec to play basketball, omg somehow addicted to it. All because of you la! that time ask me to play until now i addicted. Damn it. Took his dinner after that and i send him to school. Meet hy at vivo for a walk and dinner. Due to my lateness have to blanja her dinner. We went to eat long john silver combo 1, 2 piece chicken. I was too full so i gave her 1 of my chicken and i only ate 1. HAHA! after that we went shop for shoes but no size for me. AWW so sad. NVM we went time zone to play our FAVOURTIE basketball again! haha, this time round the distance for shooting the ball is so damn far. Difficult to aim:( Played racing cars also. Each of us pay $5. Hmm then after that went out and lie on the wooden platform and see stars********. The wind so cold~ Strike 11 then it's TIME to take MRT home! anyway enjoy my day with him in the afternoon and her at night. Thanks for accompany me whenever my off day:)

__________________________________________________________________

Ang, even though i know you have been working very hard for your job, but if those people can't see your effort and hard work, no point staying with them. Work for those who really can see your effort and hard work. So don't worry, i am sure if you really work hard, you will climb up to a better post. If they don't want you, it's their losses to give up a talent. Ok so not to worry so much now, just continue to work hard:)i'll Pray hard that you will still stay on to your current job.

2009-02-24T05:59:00.000-08:00

Yesterday went to my sista house eat tom yam maggie again as her leg is still swollen like a PIG. Hehe the tom yam maggie damn nice. Meet them around 5 plus at compass point and the 2 of them went to ask for jobs vacancies. But too bad, no luck. Haha, was very hungry on the way and i bought hot and spicy chipster, hello panda and salmon sushi, after that then they decided to go trim their hair. Feel like trimming too. But i scare my hair won't be straight after trimming. So wait till i have the money to rebond my hair again then i trim. Eat my hello panda inside the hairdresser then when i eat finish then the guy told me i am not suppose to eat inside their shop. -.- rather don't say. After that buy my favourite grass jelly soya milk drink and my friend drink pearly then walk back to her house. Had fun and laughter there. Took some pictures as usual. Cam Whoring is our favourite! hehe! then slack all the way till 11+. Me and ys walk out together and she went to take MRT. So i went to take my bus. While waiting for bus, she called me and ask me to wait for her as she has missed her last train. HAHAHA! Took bus together and reach serangoon. Wanted to take 147 back to her house at boon keng, but last bus had already left. HOHO! luckily still got bus 853 that she can take to potong pasir then take her 65 back home. Anyway had fun with them.

Back to today, early in the morning get up and work. To my surprise, our call centre had already started. Oh man! i was all alone in the morning, damn freaking bored la. Had to handle calls from that old virgin JILL even though our calling centre already started. It makes not much difference. Early in the morning already not in good mood as my colleague keep playing prank call on me. Somehow feel damn irritated. Never give me a piece of mind. I think if this continue, sooner or later when a real customer call in, i sure be in hot soup. I won't be surprise if this really happens. Ask her don't disturb, she keep denying that she's the one. So pissed off. If she admit it's her, i won't get so pissed off. Keep saying it's her and she keep deny. Fucking stress. Never think of people feelings only know how to play. Whatever la. hais hais hais so sian leh. Tomorrow again alone in the night. Really can bored to death. I hate calling centre open. Next month it's my turn to go in to calling centre. SIAN!!!!!!!!

-.-!!

2009-02-22T08:53:00.000-08:00

Hais today so damn blur while working. Whole day damn blur. Maybe not enough sleep yesterday. Heh! Spend almost more than half the day outside. Somemore got one customer bought so much 10k plus items for 3 different invoices under installment. Wanted to collect his vouchers, i see already my eyes can CROSS x.x..so damn fucking filthy rich. Hmm, while counting his voucher, cold sweat when i was all alone. Luckily xana came back to help me. If not i don't know how long will i take to figure out the whole thing. Hate do things that concern money, so damn stress. At night the ATM cannot dispense cash. So i called up the DBS bank to ask them come and top up the cash. I called the hotline and a guy picked up, saying good evening may i help you. Then i say good morning, eh no good afternoon, nono good night.......-.- then correction again, good evening. Finally got the right word. Don't know what i am doing. Even the guy say good evening to me again, without laughing. Hais so malu until i ownself also laugh. Need to train up on my spoken english. Can type but can't speak fluent. All half bucket water. Ok stop here, tata!

2009-02-21T08:55:00.000-08:00

My SISTA for life!

Nevermind no flyers at least i still got a chance to stand beside it;)

suicide

stupid

What the hell man! today wake up so damn early at 6am just to queue up for the SINGAPORE FLYER. I still tell hy, we like so damn kiasu, go so early. So we dilly dally walk all the way there thinking there shouldn't be much people there. But who knows, when we reach there, 1 WHOLE POOL OF ANTS. Already reach there queueing up for the free tickets. Some even camp there from yesterday 11pm till this morning. I still thought we are the most kiasu people, didn't expect people to be much more kiasu. Now i know what typical SINGAPOREAN is. HAHA! so we are not consider one of them. So didn't get our ticket at all. Damn it i wanna have a ride ! Damn freaking tired, spend more than half of my day outside. But anyway took some pictures over there :) Poor hy when crossing road trip and almost fall, luckily i support her and she scratch my hand-.- THANKS arh, if not she will fall badly. Even a trip can make her leg swollen like a pig. HAHA. After that went her house and eat and chat. YAWNS, now very very tired. Will upload pictures here soon^__^

2009-02-20T05:17:00.000-08:00

Headache headache! early this morning got a sms from my ex-boyfriend. Saying :" Up till now i still can't stop thinking of you, but i can't imagine to see you again,everytime i imagine if i see you outside my thinking will be want to hide from you." I was awake by his sms. I read it and just fall back into sleep. Then i had nightmare about him, keep pestering me, and we even chat on the phone. I dream he even kneel down and knock his head on the floor and beg me not to leave him. Oh my god man, it just seem so real. Had a headache when i wake up to go for work. Never had a proper sleep after seeing those message. HAIS when will all this stop? today i went work was totally blurred. I write down the HCC things without even sorting out different catagories. But after working awhile then feel much more better. Today philip aunty cook soup and choco cakes damn nice. HAHA i love the soup so SWEET~yummy. Also got the nuo mi fan, mike use it to tempt me, hahaha! but too full to eat it. Then talk cock with him, and come to some topic link with my boyfriend. Hehe. He say me cling onto him don't want let him go. I asked him you so sure is i am the one who cling onto him not he cling onto me is it? HAHA. After that He told me my boyfriend very cute, keep disturbing him ask him who is your girlfriend, what's her name, and he don't dare to say out my name. Only tell him : " there that 1 lor, from mega that 1." Then mike say he disturb him again and say mega so many how he know which 1. Hahaha. After that mike say he ask him will he have another girlfriend next time anot, and he told mike won't, i am the last 1 to him. Then mike ask him, you so sure and serious? Then he pause and think for awhile , and say ya. Then i say aiya now he at woodland courts later he find pretty girls and will go for it. Then he say woodland all old aunty no pretty girl except for 1 female promoter very pretty. Haha the way mike say it so funny. And we also talk about his personality, that he's very career minded which mike and me also agreed. I told mike i won't be surprise that he put career infront of me. Anyway he's still young and still have lots to learn. Mike also asked me is he hot-tempered, and i say yes sometimes. One advice is to control his own temper in work is a must. Which i think it's true. Anyway just quarrel with him. Things settled. Bad temper people is like that. I am not a good temper person also. That's why always hard to hard. Sometimes somehow really tired of that. I just can't change my temper. I know my temper sucks. But when i am good i can be real good:) But mostly i am good if you don't step on my tail=P Just now even my mum ask me when can i change my stupid temper. Last time also like that now also. That's my personality what, i just have the same temper as my father. Hais, sorry i didn't want it to be this way either. One more thing is about my colleagues. Heard the stories between him and her. Felt so disappointed in the guy whom i USED TO ADMIRE previously when i first step in Courts. Now not anymore. Really drop all the way to the bottom of my heart. He seem so decent,innocent type and yet, when there are girl who free give herself to him, he actually go for it and did all those kind of things and their relationship is just FRIENDS. What to say? really makes me disppointed in guys. Should i say the guy cheap? or the girl cheap? or both even better? Guys doesn't seem to have those kind of resistance huh? as long as the girl give herself to them, they just "eat". Am i right to say? Sometimes i wish i am single and can play as much as i want, but now i have my boy, i don't want to think about all this things, like what people always say, not all guys is the same. So i have faith in him that he is out of so many guys, he's the only few that won't do this kind of things. He have his own principal and that's what he told me. If he break his own principal i make sure he kanna AIDS. HAHAHA! SEE YOU DARE ANOT. Hmm.... very tired now. Tomorrow need to wake up at 6am with her for the singapore flyer. SINCE WHEN WE BECOME SUCH A TYPICAL SINGAPOREAN! OMG!!KIASU!anyway i'll end here. update soon!

my dear lawrence ang guan nam.. sorry always treat you so bad and yet you always make the first move to apologise. But this time round is really your fault for showing me attitude. And to be honest to you, i really disappointed in guys whom i see and know so far. Hope you are totally different from the rest of the guys. I have faith in you. I just can't tolerate this kind of guys. Temper i can tolerate but not this. If you don't treasure me, all i do is just leave. But i do hope you treasure me always. When i am not with you,i can't take care of you, Please do take good care of yourselves, don't get cut here and there,love you.....

vivo

2009-02-18T10:05:00.000-08:00

2am in the morning. Haven't into bed. HEHE. Just blog for fun now before i go sleep. Now i am damn hungry siaaaaaaaa. HAHA never had dinner of cause hungry:( Ya today went out with guan nam. Heh, see him wear the t-shirt i gave him, felt happy but seem abit too small or i should say TIGHT FIT. HAHAHAHAHA! next time should get for him LARGE =P. Today went imperial kitchen eat, my aunty order so many food for us to eat. YUMMY YUMMY. Eat till my stomach bloated. But still got receive ang bao from the 3 aunties of mine. Thanks:) After finish eating we went walk walk awhile before i went to meet my ah nam. Me and ah nam went to vivo after that, and watch the LOVE MATTERS. The show quite nice. Can show us some real life examples of married husband and wife or even couples, can learn something from this show. Reccommanded for you peeps to watch. After the show, we gotta walk all the down to basement, and that was when i SLIP and FELL down the stairs. I was totally stunned and blurred as in how i fell. I had step down the stairs but i don't know how i still fell. Luckily i got my hubby, he was sharp and react immediate and fast enough to use his strength and grab hold of me. If not i think i might have hurt my backbone and slip all the way down to the first stairs. But this fall i never feel any pain at all, cause he grab me in time and i wasn't hurt and pain. Really thanks alot dear. He still so caring and concern whether i am hurt anot. So touched~.~ i thought he will laugh at me but he didn't. So surprise. HAHAHA! so MALU lehhhh. After everything done, i send him to school:) Went back to vivo after that to meet 2 of my buddies and bought some stuff, eat snacks and chit chat with the big wind blowing. Never take my dinner cause still very filling. Took lotsa photos as usual:) Went home, saw the SWAROVSKI necklace my daddy bought and choose for me. I love it. It's very simple and nice:) just a round diamond:) woo thank you daddy.

Some pictures that we took....

2009-02-16T05:56:00.000-08:00

HELLO! So long didn't had the chance to blog already. Hee. Kinda busy with work and stuff.
Valentines Day just past not long ago. Although didn't get to spend it with my lawrence on the day itself, we already celebrate it in advance. Actually not only on Valentines then we can be more loving or whatsoever, to a couple, everyday is a Valentine to them, but it's just that it's a more special day. But to me, every moment spend together is more than anything else. BIG THANKS FOR THE CARD YOU MADE, REALLY APPRECIATE IT. Although it's not flowers or what. Just felt happy to get to see him once a week, though it's quite little since the both of us working. I have to understand that. Time to us is very precious. Whenever we are together, time always past very fast. But i can't do anything about that. Sometimes I really don't know why my attitude towards him so sucks. It's not his fault at all and he didn't even do anything bad to me. I think it's just my own attitude for being so fucked up. Sometimes i just pity him have to endure with my nonsense and sorts. Hais. Yesterday just told him i don't have the feeling that i am in love, i know it really hurts to hear this. Sometimes i think back, i am the 1 who never show him much love at all. Inspite he never said this kind of things to me, that i am not showing him any love. I think most of the problems lies with me and not him. I felt so bad. And whats more is he actually blame himself for not showing much love to me, and saying sorry to me. I should be the 1 saying sorry. Really feels bad. It's been six month we've been together. I want to last long with him, but i don't have the faith in it. Maybe from my past experience which makes me lose confidence in relationships. I am real real sorry, to stress you up, and making you feel that you are not a good boyfriend but actual facts is that i am not a good girlfriend to you.

But i wanna tell you is that, i love you, i wanna last long with you, i need lots of your care and loves. That's all.

2008-12-24T10:13:00.000-08:00

yeah! it's Christmas. Coming to the end of the year again. A brand new year coming. Time pass damn fast. Just a glance, and poof! gone. Lots of things happen in this year and lots of things changes. Well past is past, let's not dewell in it anymore. Thou have happiness and sadness at the same time. Well life is like that. Have to experience it ourselves in order to improve more on ourselves. If not we will never grow up to be a better person. Hehe long time didn't blog. Well it's kinda boring anyway for blogging, cos yuanshan asked me to update so now got time i update a little alright. HAHA. see i so give you face ok! hmm ya yesterday was christmas eve and i went out with the same 2 old buddy of mine hauyee and yuanshan to orchard. Actually we wanted to go to the paya lebar warehouse to take a look at the sales. But then the "gundu" us don't know how to go and we walk and walk till we reach paya lebar mrt. Then give a call to yuanshan to tell her we are lost. LOL. So end up we decided to go straight to orchard instead. Keep on raining today. So we just went far east to shop. Shop and ended up buying another shorts for myself. hehe. really no money already. Hope my salary come faster. haha! Really need money for my new year clothes. Thou i have lots of clothes. After which we went up to have our dinner in one of the shop. Quite nice anyway. I had my unagi noodle , hauyee had her minced meat noodle whereas yuanshan had her tom yam noodle. Not too expensive. After that shop shop for hauyee's shoe but no luck. hahaha! i see mac and i wanted to have my SUNDAE!! so went to mac and we just sit down and chit chat. I love SUNDAE HOT FLUDGE! hehe! anyway it was fun sitting down chit chatting with em as we normally do. Taking pictures is our everytime favourite. HEHE. On the dot of 9pm, they had to go home. so we just took mrt home. anyway i am having a great day with you girls. so glad to have you all. even without my boyfriend, it's alright. HAHA! as long as i have you all to accompany me. Hais but i feel quite troubled this few days with my ex keep messaging me. He's the one who ditched me and now he wants me back. What am i to him? a spare tire? when he don't want me he just threw me aside. when he wants me back then come for me. Please i am not your spare tire. Just die heart on me can? i had no more feelings for you. If you happen to read this blog, please. stop messaging me for my goodness sake and yours goodness sake. understand? is not that i don't even wanna be friends with you. Just look at your own attitude. you think i am not scared? ok whatever shit. i don't wanna give a damn. anyway gotta end here and sleep now. Later Christmas meeting boyfriend, wonder how is it. hehe. Just wait and see. Nights!

2008-11-13T07:47:00.000-08:00

Heard many stories from people around. There's no everlasting relationship. People married and divorce. Felt kinda disappointed in every guys. I know i shouldn't had judge it this way, but it's all facts. Guys can't be trusted. Maybe not only guys can't be trusted, like my colleague says, nowadays girls also no faithful anymore. Ya maybe it's true. I don't know whether i can put anymore feelings in relationship anymore or not. Seems so tired. I don't know which guys is trustable and which is not. Or single would be the best choice? rather than married and then divorce? what's the point like that? i rather go flirt around since i am still young. Maybe after 1st r/s failure i have become stronger each day. i don't wanna put all my heart in a guy. it's scary. i hate that kind of feeling when i lost something. really HATE it. Life without guys can be good too, but at the same time feels lonely. But i think we should depend on ourselves rather on people. jiayou to myself! i don't want history to repeat again. FUCK IT!

2008-10-29T10:22:00.000-07:00

Today went out with him. Finally a proper dating after 2months plus together. Haha, cause everyime in the past he always need to go for his lesson at 6pm. Now finally he got the time to rest for up till don't know when. Actually had planned to go for cycling today but it's so damn fucking hot and he don't wanna cycle. haha. but for me anyway my period came just nice today. so ya, it's alright. Hmm, well went for movie and the movie is real nice and funny. But i forgotten the title of that movie. Hehe. We went PS to watch the movie. He ate his lunch there and he bought me my red ruby:) walk walk around PS till the time for the movie to start. it's kinda boring walking around PS cause nothing much to walk thou. After finish the movie we walk from PS all the way to orchard cause nothing better to do. Singapore is so damn small CAN! hehe! walk around heeren then saw wei rong and a malay guy from my ITE but forgotten his name cause never really talk to him. after that walking towards paragon heard some one shouting my name. guess what it's hazel! together with the girlfriend so ya, so COINCIDENT PLEASE. after that ang and me had our dinner there. Thereafter he send me home and he went home after that. Haha, ang.. i enjoyed the day with you. Hope to have more outings again:) since we met up once a week only:( i appreciate everything you did for me. end here tata.

2008-10-24T09:38:00.000-07:00

Hehe! long time no post blog already. Cause i am damn damn busy alright! with works.
Never even have much time to rest thou. Haha, see my hao jie mei start to post blog then i try post abit too since she wanna know my daily life. *SHY* HAHAHA!
yea yea ever since i broke up with him, i never ever wanna blog, cause actually this blog is meant for me and him. But now i think not any more.
Hmm ya coming into Courts to work really bring so much difference to my life ok.
Firstly, i broke up with my ex boyfriend not long after working in Courts, but met another 1 in Courts too. Which is like i started working in courts since 4th of july, and broke up with him at the 21st of july. It's like too coincident. After broke up, another guy just came into my life. Which is like around early August, I was quite surprise too. I wonder courts brings me luck or bad luck. For breaking up with my ex and at the same time giving me another guy to be my boyfriend.
Up till now i still cannot believe that i am together with my new guy:) it's like too unbelivable cause i felt that it's just too fast for me to accept another guy in my life. Maybe at 1st i accept him is just to fill up the empty place which my ex left it. I hope that it won't be the case now. It's been 2 months plus right now and we are still doing pretty well. I hope this will carry on:) i know that he won't have the same personality as my ex who will always gives in to me. cause in this world, no one is the same. But anyway, what i wanted most is the sense of security. And the word commitment. Even though i know i am still unable to give commitment due to my failure of my past relationship. But if he does, i will too. So i'll just take my time to see for myself. I still cannot have the trust and faith in guys. Actually is to prevent me from getting hurt again. So i'll just keep it this way. Anyway i know that he's trying his very best to make me satisfy in every thing he does. Making me happy and sorts. Thanks dear. ANG..Wish that our honeymoon period will never be over......:)

i've think it through.

2008-07-22T18:09:00.000-07:00

This is the probably last post for you. ya thanks so much for being my boyfriend and letting me have such kind of experience. we have been like quarreling through our way out. maybe because of my stupid attitude which makes you leave me. i don't blame you for leaving. after taking so much stress from me. well i really kinda excited waiting for our 1 year anniversary to come. but the day will never come i think. you've really changed a lot. no more caring to me. use words to hurt me. no matter how hard i cry. you don't care anymore. from your word yesterday, it was really hurting. i cried infront of my colleague. but well, all of them come and comfort me. giving me support. i can find a BETTER GUY! yeah that's what i think. womens are like diamonds. a shining one. not a crystal, and i am the good quality diamond which is shining up brightly. that's what my colleague told me. i really agree. i am sure that there will be someone, that will appreciate all my outer and inner beauty. so maybe you're just not that person which love me whole heartedly. you think more of my bad points than good points. which already shows something. you don't treasure me. if you've thought of my good points, you won't mind all this bad points. and you are the one, who keep pestering me. to accept you, to give you chance. at 1st i tried hard to accept you. but is really difficult. cause all along, i wanted a handsome boyfriend, a rich man. but because you. i thrown my mindset away. i am a person with pride. from the day you chase me so hard. you should have know my personality. and yesterday i just can't imagine i say those stuff to you. i really put down all my pride. maybe from that week before i should have just let you go. i have my friends and family. they are all encouraging me. i am still young. so what for cry over a tree instead a forest? you are a egoistic person. you care much more for yourselves than me. our honeymoon period is over. i think we are still not mature enough to handle our relationship. since you don't wanna give me chance to try all over again. i won't force you. i have think it through. i am going to meet you later. i will try to control my emo later without crying. i will still be as cool as now. freedom!here i come:)
i'll just kiss you on the mouth. if i feel that the feeling is already gone. then let this be our very last kiss. but i still won't forget you as my best friend. we still can stay in contact no matter what. if i wanna go shopping or you wanna go shopping. we still can accompany each other as a friend.
and you are forever my precious guy. you got any problem you still can come to me if you want find someone to talk. i'll always be there for you. goodbye my past love:)

2008-07-05T08:14:00.000-07:00

Seems so long didn't blog already. Cause nowadays is real damn tired.
working and sorts. Yup now updating my current stuff. heh.
just quit my photocopying job at peace centre. well the people there is quite ok,only for some.
i know somehow i will quit the job cause i keep can't get used to it.
it's pretty stress there. need to remember this and that. oh my goodness lor!
do wrong things and being scolded for being careless.
ask more and double confirm also being scolded. what the hell?
maybe i blame myself for being such a slow learner, and my stupidity.
what can i do? lol.
so i told my boss, i want to quit at the end of June. she seemed so happy-.-
and once Saturday comes, after work, she straight ask me come over,
and says she wanna talk to me. To my surprise, she actually calculate finish my pay,
ask me whether am i sure that i wanna quit?i say ya.
then she give me the cheque, ask me don't have to report anymore.
i wanted to help her work till monday but she doesn't appreciate my kindness.
Cause i was afraid that they might not have enough people to cover my stuff, and 1 of the experience auntie there was resigning too.
but to my surprise, they wanted me to leave as soon as possible.
their reason is : monday won't have much things to do, so you don't have to come anymore.
so from then on, i knew that they thinking i was a waste of money to them.
kick me out as soon as possible to decrease their losses.
then i was like LOL! my father guess it! that they won't want to keep me either.
haha! ok enough of this shit.
back to my current life.
now i was working in courts. which evon introduce me into it.
i was in the wizkid department. so far it was my 2nd day and the staff there was quite nice and friendly.
hehe! but only for now. i can't predict the future.
who knows what others are thinking. but with my purify heart. i don''t think will have anything happen?o.o!
must look look see see. hehe!
today weekend really quite BUSY.OMG!
I WAS GOING TO FAINT!
yesterday was slack! haha so see the difference?o.o!
it was only my 2nd day and something happened.
my colleague handphone drop inside the toilet bowl and being flush away.
haha that's the 1st time i see such things. so surprise. and the toilet bowl was not even stuck!
anyway feel sorry for her. cos it's not a cheap phone.
ok stop my working life here.
want to say about my boyfriend.
just damn pissed off by him. called him and want him to talk to me. he went to sleep while i was talking.
what the fuck?!
aiya whatever it is. i heck care.
when i really don't give a damn to him.
then he start to panic and keep on calling and messaging me.
if not, he won't even bother to take the 1st initiative to sms me or call me.
what a useless boy. only now he keep calling. i rather he don't call.
haiz. whatever la. going sleep now and prepare for work tomorrow.
nights:)

2008-05-23T07:11:00.000-07:00

woots!today is my 5th day of work. is damn tiring.
currently working in peace centre printing and photocopying shop.
oh my god man. don't know can stay in that job for how long.
but so far the colleague there isn't bad.
but still doesn't have anything to talk with them cause i think due to age gap?
hehe:X or maybe i am still quite new, don't really know how to communicate with them.
so long didn't blog already. since now free =D(need to spend my time preciously)
hmm, up till now i still not really familiar with the things there.
customer come i only serve them IF i can. haha!
mostly on photocopying. but i felt really nervous when serving customers.
maybe will feel use to it when time passed.
but i need to thanks my VERY PRECIOUS DARLING!VICTOR KOHHHHHH!!
ever since 1st day of my job. he has been accompanying me all the while.
accompany me talk on phone during my break time, morning time and even night time.
fetch me after my work and even having lunch with me for the 1st day!
i am soooooooooooooooo proud and happy to found such a NICE BOYFRIEND!
he has been spending most of his time with me even in CAMP!
he's my 1 and only!I LOVE YOU!MUACKS!
how can a boyfriend be so good till ................... WOW!
can even sacrifice his sleeping time just the sake of me!
although i keep quarrel with you a lot of times, but i hope you can forgive me.
for my rudeness, unreasonable and my stupid attitude although you also have =X
all your support have bring me so far. i won't let you down.
i promised you i will try to stay in this job as long as possible=X(hopefully)
if no one bully me or whatever. but most importantly they must pay me every month and must be punctual!but so far they didn't ask me for my bank account number.
so i don't know how they will pay me. T.T
i wanted to ask, but don't have the face to ask for it cause i have only worked for 1week.
still long way to go. haha!
anyway i stopping here. tata! going talk with my darling soon and sleep=D

OH YA 1 MORE THING! THANKS TO MY BUDDY HAUYEE AND YUANSHAN FOR GIVING ME SUCH A GREAT SURPRISE DURING MY 1ST DAY OF WORK!COMING TO VISIT ME.THANKS A LOT GIRLS!THE 2 OF YOU JUST ROCKS!AND THANKS FOR CONCERNING ABOUT ME FINDING JOBS FOR THE PAST 2 MONTHS:)I LOVE YOU TWO.

2008-03-03T06:33:00.000-08:00

hai. what to say, today is a damn fucking bad day. really bad.
as usual went out with my darling. went to AMK hub and then to j8.
but then who knows, when go j8, got new arcade, went in take a look.
then after that while walking around, saw this game a bit like beat mania.
but i don't know what is the real name for it.
when shows demo, he went to copy the beat of the music.
then i go play with him by pushing his hand off, who knows, he shouted at me cos of that.
really pissed me off. it's already not the first time doing it. and he keep on repeating the same thing.
or i should say same mistake. hai , i really don't know what to do.
if this have to keep on repeating, i don't know what i might do.
i really very sick and tired of people shouting at me. you know i hate people shout at me right?
i told you before a lot of times. but after you shout at me, and i forgive you, you only "orh".
sometimes i wonder you really understand or not.
only "orh orh orh". today whole day feels so moody. even now.
i don't know why. i feel like i have been treating him cold tis few days.
i scared if this happen any longer, i might break with him.
please don't let my feelings for you fade. and hope you won't shout at me again.
we are really drifting further. if really 1 day i should leave you, don't ask me why.
you should know yourself.
i know you have done a lot for me, but please think for me, who would wants a boyfriend who shouts at her? and i already told you yesterday, i really scared my feeling fade for you.
but i think you should know i still love you for now, if not i won't cry yesterday, right?
please, make the feelings come back. by behaving maturely and stop behaving so weirdly.
i really very sick of it already. i can tahan you now, but not forever, ok?
ok enough of this, today the leap years, i find it so sucks. lame-.-
ok end here, bye :(

2008-02-29T05:21:00.000-08:00

WEE o WEE~FINALLY!GOING TO GRADUATE!
YIPEE! finally get the hell out of my life ~.~
hahaha!counting down to 12 of march for my exams then finish already.
^^ don't know how to describe my feelings now. it's so GOOD!
but worst come to worst, need to go to work soon.
i hope can find a job that suits me well and the salary is good too.
at least 1.5k above. hopefully=)
and the collegue must be good too, that's the best.
hahaha! oh ya, so long never use computer already due to break down of comp.
just got a new comp today. which is the 29 of feb. hehe, a special day indeed.
but anyway gotta end here. bye=)

2008-02-21T19:32:00.000-08:00

hello! i am now seriously happy to bloggggggggggggggg~
weeeeeeee! haha, counting down to 4 more days for school to finish!
FINALLY finishing soon. yeah~ get the hell out of my life please:)
it's really getting more and more relax for myself.
have been in this fucking school suffering for quite sometimes.
really dislike those people with smirk on their face.
acting like some big fuck eh?ordering girls around like what?dogs?
and please! we aren't your fucking dog huh.
stop ordering us around when we don't own you a single fuck things.
just because YOUR father got some FUCKING stinks money,
doesn't mean you are some big fuck.
ordering people around like your maid or something?
don't say we girls, even i can see that you really act big in your groups of guys.
ordering them where to go for lunch or whatever.
stop doing that ok? i think maybe someday, your so call "buddy" will just leave you.
maybe some of them really can't even stand you, but only same class, so they just have to bare with you eh? :X
but who cares? going to graduate soon. i don't have to bother how you look at me.
i just can't be bothered:D
want ask your gang of friend to leave me alone?acting like a childish big fuck?
i am totally fine with it:D
cause i already have this thinking for the past 1 year to leave this group.
but not giving my girls friends stress, i just have to bare with YOU!
but now?not anymore! cause we're going to GRADS SOON!
YIPEE! so damn happy.
no need see your big fuck attitude!
hehe finish of my complaints.
tata:D

p.s:only referring 1 person and i hope you know who you are(hint:act big fuck)

2008-02-15T05:59:00.000-08:00

Yesterday Valentine's Day was a NICE one!
5 stars for it!hehe!had no time to blog so now i MUST blog!
met my darling around 1 plus.he waited for me outside my house O.O
haha, had to wear pretty pretty as this is my first valentine ever!
when i got out of my house, there's no sign of him.
then i went walk further out a bit. and then i saw him!he was hiding his hand behind a wall-.-
but i knew he bought me a bouquet of flowers, it's so obvious. so i wasn't surprised.
muahahaha~ but when i saw the flowers, i was soooooooooooooooooo touched and happy.
flowers can make a woman happy eh? hahaha! and that's true please.
in the middle of the red flower, i saw a heart shape anklet. it was meant to be a bracelet-.-"
but he bought wrongly cause he thought it was a BRACELET! hehe!SO CUTE AND TOOT TOOT OF HIM=D
but it's ok dear! i love it anyway!then went back to my house and placed it on my table before going out. ^.^
we went sun tec shopping, that's our "old place". haha!bought a bracelet there(no more mistake)hehehe,and planned what to eat for our valentine's dinner.
he wanted to treat Fish & Co for dinner, but i think it was too expensive for him to treat.
so i suggested that we go dohby ghaut xchange,justacia, to have our dinner.
cheap and nice! hehehe!it was filling!
after that we went shopping awhile and saw a slipper that catch my eyes! blink blink la*__*
hehehe! then he bought for me. so nice of him =D
then after that i treat movies, AH LONG PTD LTD, it was damn fucking funny OK!
reccommanded for people to watch C=
after watching finish, we head back home, since it was getting late, we parted at the MRT station. and i really missed my darling=(
anyway i had a really WONDERFUL valentine with him=)
lots of thanks to him for making it a successful one ^^
i LOVE YOU BAOBEI!
here's so me pictures of the flowers^.^and bracelet and anklet and slipper^^

2008-02-01T02:09:00.000-08:00

woots so damn long never update my blog.=S
yea and now i am gonna update all this that had happened recently.=X
this fews week or days or even months, i have so much of problems!
quarreling with boyfriend so frequently.
i wished that it won't happen so much often from now on.
i knew sometimes it wasn't his fault at all, it was all my immatureness and my "big lady" attitude.
he is such a nice and caring boyfriend that one could ever ask for!
why did i expect so much from him? just because of my fucking attitude sometimes.=D
but sometimes he did really makes me so angry of him.. and YA IS REALLY ANGRY!=(
but whatever =D it's alright! i don't know what makes me so easily forgive him nowadays.
maybe my LOVE towards him has increases! and YA! HOPEFULLY!
i want to be his perfect girlfriend, and i need to change my attitude to be a better girlfriend to him.=D
everyone yearns to have a nice girlfriend/boyfriend. i am sure he is!
although sometimes he gets a bit irritated by me, but he doesn't say it out.
i know i can feel it. HEE!
anyway i love being with him, just hope he will trust me more! without any doubt on me!
i know in this whole wide world, no body can be compared to him.
other than my parents, he is the only 1 that treats me like precious!
as PRECIOUS as GEMS!wooo GEMS!
enough of crapping! i want to update on more pictures!YES MORE!
that's what he gave me on Christmas. c(=

ps:although it's been so long to update =)

envy?took lots of his damn fucking time to do it JUST THE SAKE FOR ME!=D
seldom see guys do such things for girls. BUT HE DID IT!hehe!
today went out with hy and ys. so long never see you girls! miss you all damn much!
went dohby ghaut have dinner together after their school, then crap there till the shop closing!
it was like damn fun !really have so much things to talk about. miss those days while we were in secondary school.
today 1 of my best buddy,Valerie, has gone overseas to study. I will miss her a lot='(
wish all the best to her in her studies! YOU CAN DO IT,JIAYOU!
will take her 3years in order to complete her course. Never mind, wait till you're back, we can CRAP again! and and become a GREAT DOCTOR!to cure people around!
oh ya, while going back home after biding goodbye to hy and ys in the MRT station,
i saw weini and pris at the bus stop waiting for bus to go home.
it's been so long since i met them. talking and crapping for awhile and we took bus 70 together.
i take 1 stop and alight. haha, i am just so lazy to walk please!
miss you girls too.
sorry if i talk something you all find it offensive, i am sorry. but that's my way of talking=)
hope i doesn't say wrong things =X
i think not?
haha enough of it. now i found out that lots of my secondary school friends already have a boyfriend, congrats to them. and those who hasn't, i wish you all found 1 real good prince charming, and your MR. right. most importantly, they treats you well.
ok now i just remembered, i step on dog SHIT yesterday!DAMN IT!
but it was real funny k . my classmate keep making fun of me, saying me stinks.
but it was damn unlucky man!but never mind, CNY coming, i treat it as i am going to "HUAT"!
gambling gambling and gambling! hopefully i can win lots of money and buy my PSP(green?i heard from my brother that green color is coming out soon, hooray!MY FAVORITE PLEASE!)
need to save lots of angbao money!=D
so excited about it!
next i wanna talk about my boyfriend and i, a trip to sentosa!
well it's a nice trip though! hehe! damn sunny and hot!
but it's alright, since i can have fun with him!=D
and ya, saw this peacock trying to tackle the females!opening up it's FEATHER!
and WOOTS!SO NICE!

haha ok i think i am gonna end here!
BYE=D

2007-12-30T07:12:00.000-08:00

what the fuck i am doing nowadays?
i keep getting so pissed off with him in whatever he does.
but i am angry that he always believe people easily.
i angry that he never use his brain at all.
i want him to learn himself not to trust people so easily.
i can't control myself.i called him and scolded him for his stupidity.
i am very mad!i scold and scold till he shouted at me.
felt like crying now.but what can i do?he never ever shout at me before,
and now,he is shouting at me. i think our relationship is getting worst and worst.
we only started out for only 4mths and yet all this have to happen.
really at a lost.think we are ending soon.
i knew that,if my personality still like that,i think no guys would ever wants me.
no guys could stand my temper.
think he will be giving up soon.i keep yelling at him,bullying him and all sorts.
someday somehow i knew this would be ending soon.
but it's ok if he wants to end it. cos all along,it has always be my fault for taking him for granted.
thinking that i could scold him whenever i likes.
using him as my so call "chu qi tong".
i really don't want it to happen,but i really can't control myself.
sometimes i really hate myself for being like that.
and lastly,i am sorry.i will try to control my this fucking temper.
..........

2007-11-20T05:07:00.000-08:00

woots~today got time to post so i post something.
hehe.last Sunday went out with my precious.
he was waiting for me downstairs my house.
he bought me a gift,a wallet that i always wanted it but feeling it was too expensive to buy.
he bought it to ask for my forgiveness to him.but i have already forgiven him.
i was so touched by him,with those wordings on the wallet.
it's not the wallet i am happy about,it's his thought that makes me happy.
writing:"IM SORRY,BAOBEI.I LOVE U."
i am so surprised that he would do such thing.but i was touched:)
we went shopping around in china town.my damn shoe keep biting me.
makes me so difficult to walk.
haha,he went to buy me a slipper as he promised me he would buy for me since he spoil my slipper last time.hehe.thanks baobei!
i also bought a wallet for my besties since her birthday is approaching.
after shopping around,we went to vivo to shop.
then walk to harbour front centre.
we saw the magnet key chain,a girl and a boy.
he bought for the both of us.
I've take the boy and he take the girl,cos he's a GAY!
HAHA! after shopping around,we took a bus home.
he sent me home,and on our way home,
i saw 7-eleven shop outside got a $1 machine,to roll out the capsule.
i wanted to roll it,cos i need a pad lock to lock my cash box,to prevent people to steal my MONEY!$$$$$HAHA!
but end up,he rolled it for me.
A bomber man pad lock.hehe,so nice of him.
I've wasted him lots of money T.T
sorry to have let you waste so much money on me T.T
precious must try to save up money already ok?
next time eat lesser,if not your tummy is getting bigger each day!!FAT ASS!!!
squeeze your stomach and let you itch till die!
MUAHAHAHAHA!
ok i'll end here.
baobei love you.

2007-11-16T20:25:00.000-08:00

when I'm with you,i can feel very blessed,feel happy,feel sad,feel very hurt.
i never had this kind of feelings before.
when i used to be single,i was thinking why my friends,because of some problems in their relationship,they will cry.
i told them,if it was me,i won't cry over such matter.
if want break then just let it be.
but now i could finally understand why is it so difficult to let go,and it can make a person cry,and so much agony:( it was really painful.
how i wished i was single all along.
and not get into such relationship.it really hurt much.
it's you who bring so much joy to my life,
and
it's you who bring so much misery to my life.
without you,i could be much better right now.
but now,i really couldn't get over it with you.
you just stand so much percent in my life now.
how am i suppose to let you go?
even if i can't,i need to try.
i wish to give you a chance.but can you promise that you won't make the same mistake again?
and if i give you a chance,will you take it for granted?
what if you take it for granted,will you be hurting my heart again and again?
and who will be the one who is giving me a chance?
NO ONE!my mind now is in a whirl,i don't what i should do now.
whether to give you another chance?or just break up.
seeing your sms,makes me cry.i really wanted to give you another chance.
cos i still loves you.but i am afraid,you will hurt me again and again.
i don't want to be tied up with the same thing again.
it took me quite a long time to have the courage to break up with you,
and set my mind up.
even when i dream,i dream that we are quarreling.
but when sms came,it totally changed my mind.
i really wanted to give you a chance.
but i was thinking,will you treasure it?ask yourself please.
i don't want you to give me such a big blow again.
i really can't take it anymore.my head is very pain now.cracking the cells up.
should i reply your sms?or not?i am thinking real hard.
i can't bare to leave you too.
i can only have 2 choices.
but now,i really don't know.
i hope you can take the initiative to read my blog and know how i am feeling.
but i never regret being together with you.
it's you who slowly touches my heart,by your sincerity,your concern,your care and your perseverance.
no matter how long you will still wait for me,and slowly touches my heart.
sweetie,i really do loves you a lot,but you kept doubting my love towards you.
and even said i treat you like shit.
do you know you hurt my heart deeply?by saying all these?
but last of all,
baby,i love you as much as you love me.i don't blame you for anything.

please trust me.

wrote on Saturday,November 17,2007,1 pm.
PS: The Blogger Timing is Wrong

2007-11-13T07:39:00.000-08:00

i don't know what's wrong with me now.i just get pissed off so easily.i don't want to.
but i really can't helped it.so sorry that i always flare my anger at you,when you did no wrong.
maybe you're the only one that i can behave like this in front of.no one else i can behave like this.
i know in this whole wide world,other than my families,you're the one who always put me in your first priority.maybe because of this,i always take you for granted.i didn't mean to.
i wanted to love you like how u love me.but sometimes,i just need you to give me more love than i give you,and i know u did:) you always did.
being together with you,is such a wonderful things all i can have:) do you know it?
i am glad that we are able to met in such a wide world with lots of people,and i think we are fated to meet:) so long as where you are and where i am,we will meet somehow even though now we didn't met.
but thank god,gave us a chance to meet and to love each other:D
i hope you can always love me like what you are doing now,and i can always love you like what i am doing now too:)
or even more than now.it's you,who makes my life brighter and livelier.living up to the fullest each day.accompany me each day,caring for me and concerning for me.chatting with me on the phone for hours till i feel tired.i am really happy with you by my side.SERIOUSLY!
i hope you won't because of such small things jealous of people or what.most importantly is,you are sure that i really love you right now!~so STOP BEING JEALOUS OF OTHER GUYS! :)
but,anyway,that's shows that you really treasure me and love me.i am happy for that:)
not forgetting about my best friends too.

NOTES FOR YOU(VKSY):really sorry for always letting you give in to me every time even when i am in the wrong.you've always let me.and sorry to flare up on you for no particular reason or whatsoever.and you never ever take any chances to scold me or flare up on me:(
I AM REALLY SORRY!
MOST IMPORTANTLY,YOU ARE MY PRECIOUS BAOBEI!LOVE YOU SO MUCH,AND YOU KNOW I ALWAYS DO:)PLEASE BARE WITH ME!~^^

2007-10-29T05:13:00.000-07:00

today was damn fucking pissed of by a bastard.
by right,i shouldn't have make myself mad about such a person.
i didn't really know the way he talk mean no harm or whatever.
i just dislike the look on his face acting like some "yaya" person.
just because he is clever?he can shout at me?i ain't your dog please.
when i just step into the class today,being late,he straight shouted at me for being late.
saying"so late then come,must well don't come".
hey! me being late doesn't concern about you right?
don't you dare tell me,you WAS NEVER LATE BEFORE?
you late can,people late cannot?you think you what?only dare act big in front of me,
just because i am good tempered?good to bully?ok fine forget about it.
i just take it that you are just playing.like as normal.
after that,another class,i call teacher come,you asked me don't "kio sai".
what the fuck i "KS"?i don't have to.i can wait since you called teacher 1st.
do you need to shout at me?and give me see your FUCKING face?stupid GOAL POLE.
please wipe off the smirk on your face and stop being so PROUD.
and you'd think that people likes to play with you a lot?OH please dude~!take a mirror and take a look at yourself!:)
and ya,if you are kidding with me,please say so.
because the disgusted look on your face only irritates me!
and that "yaya" face of yours make me irritated too:)
please,next time want show face to people,please don't!cos,i am afraid that people might give a slap on your face:D
oh ya,please don't talk to me when i DIDN'T talk to u,don't so "BHB" when i never talk to you:)
i just don't wanna hear your voice.so SHUT!;)
please use a plastic bag to cover your face. IT SPOILS MY MOOD SEEING YOU!Thanks:)
HaH~

-mylittlesecretmysteries-

2007-09-27T09:13:00.000-07:00

what the fuck?now i am kinda moody after quarreling with somebody.
is not i am unreasonable that i wanted to find something to quarrel with him.
do you think i like to quarrel?no way!
i hate quarreling with people.i like peace.
is not that i wanted to hurt your pride ok?
if you hadn't complain so much about this and that,
will i so be fucked up?that makes me wanna hurt your pride?
it's never a single day that i won't heard complains from you.
you are never a day well enough.
play awhile of games, you say yours eyes pain and feels giddy.
if that's the case, you should jolly well know your limits.
if you can't play games for too long, just say so.
i won't even eat you up.if you think you are tired,and should stop playing games,say so.
this is not the first time i hear all this from you.
a lot of times, i have been hearing from you saying that, you felt giddy,headache or whatever shits.
then why forced yourself ?
you knew very well that my talking way is a little harsh to you.
saying that you are weak,"ahgua",useless or whatever.
if i never harsh to you,will you be able know your limits?
and do you ever know, whenever you told me all this, i felt so worried?
being harsh to you, is meant for your own good. so that you can go rest.
but you didn't know my intention.
instead of this, you add in another word useless to describe yourself when i didn't even say that.
you think i am saying you useless but i am not.
i want you to know your limits well.
if u can't do it then don't forced yourself to do it.
can you please understand.
and when you always like that, i feel so fucked up.
so definitely i will be angry with you.
but then after that, what did you do?
you keep thinking why i treat you like that. all this all that.
then you told me you can't remember your names all this shit.
ALL THIS IS TOTALLY SHIT!
i fucking don't believe all this kind of things.
is not that you have a knock on your head badly that makes you can't remember who you are.
i know that you saying all this is want me to put all my focus on you.
want me to show more concern instead of angry with you.
if you really can't remember you name,
then i suggest, you should go for a mental health check.
if you really got mental problem. then i can understand why you can't remember your name.
but since you don't have mental problem,i don't see a reason for you can't remember your own name.
all this are all nonsense!
don't keep using all this kind of excuses for me to pity you or make me not angry with you.
i really hate it.
don't say i never remind you,
if you keep finding all sorts of nonsense excuses,or even trying to do something foolish,by making me not angry with you,instead of worrying for you,
don't blame me from drifting further away from you!i am serious.
stop using all this to bluff and threaten me.
sometimes i felt so stressed, that you might really do foolish things.
i felt that i should stay further away from you.
but i can't. i have feelings too.
i hate people whose thinking are so damn immature and so unrealistic.
please,get a life. stop living in your dream.
and can you, please stop lying and bluffing or even threatening me(like suicide,holding your breathe and etc), just because you wanted me to stay by your side?
making me feel guilty?makes you happy?is that your love for me like this?
i really wanted to know....the real answer....

2007-09-21T09:37:00.000-07:00

Well,today it's a fun day and it's also a "scary" day for me.
today me and my friend went ttsh to see him,cause he was having an operation for his throat.
it's some extra meat in his throat which makes him can't breathe properly. and blocking his airway.
it's better recommended for him to remove it asap, to prevent it from getting bigger in the future.
but since i thought that it has been like that since he was young,
i wouldn't recommend him to go for this operation,since operation will have some risk.
i don't want him to take any risk.
but since he told me it's getting bigger,my thinking have changed.
feels that it might benefits him for this operation.but same time worried for him.
when he went in the operation theater,i was quite scared he might not make it through.
so after that me and my friend went to eat and shop while waiting for him to be out.
after shopping for 2hrs plus,thinking that since his mum didn't message me that he's out.
we decided to went back to the hospital to check it out.
when we reached,my friend helped me ask the nurse there,whether he is out or not.
but he is still not out.we waited at the ward for few hours.but still not out.
seeing some patient being pushed out of the operation theater,hoping it was him in the bed.
2 being pushed out but not a single sign of him.my heart pumped really fast.
waiting and waiting,finally i SAW HIM.YAY!finally a PHEW!he was safe and sound.
at that point of time,i was really glad and happy.
and we faster went in the ward to take a look at him.while my friend contact his mum and told her that her son was out.but where was she?
i heard the nurses told him that his parents have already gone home and only will come back to bring him back tomorrow.
i was like,HUH?how can they just went home like that?when their son isn't out of the operation?
aren't they at least worried about him?for being in the operation for such a long time?
why is there such a parents?some more he is the only son?didn't they cared for him?
what kind of a parent are they?even me,can't just walk away when he isn't out,being so worried that something bad might happen.(but thank goodness,he was fine)how can they do this?they should at least STAYED with him until he is out.
but when i see him able to move his hand and play around,i was pretty glad:)
but at the same time,seeing him in pain and couldn't talk makes me feel sad.
but so long as you are fine,i am glad:)
hope you recover fast,we can go out together again.
i just loved being together with you,protecting me,letting me making me happy and etc.THANKS for everything you did for me,i really appreciate it.in my heart,i really know you did a lot of things for me.I REALLY KNOW IT!
haha,anyway rest well ok?you will be missed by me.
ok enough of this.
after that went marina to have dinner with my "long time no meet"good friends,for gathering with the 2 of them,such a long time never see them.
haha,after all these years,they are still the same.no changed.they are still as humor as before.
maybe too long never meet them,it feels quite strange while talking.cause the topic is quite different than before.but overall,still get to chat quite a lot.quite fun gathering with only the 4 of us.after bloated our stomach,we went home.haha.anyway a fun day with you guys.a memorable day:D

-my little secret mysteries-

2007-09-04T05:10:00.000-07:00

without love,there's no promise.
without promise,there's no love.
it's the same for love and promise.
why promise a person,
when you knew you won't be able to keep it?
why love a person,
when you keep breaking a promise towards them?
i hate it,when a person promised me something,
and "that" person not able to keep the promise.
then what's the point?
it's not that i FORCED "that" person to promise me.
i had asked lots of times,whether "that" person can keep the promise anot.
end up?it became my fault!
lol huh?
for making "that" person falling sick or whatever.
yea yea,my fault ok?
for making YOU to promise me such a stupid PROMISES.
and giving me an empty promises.
last,giving me such a FUCKING attitude!
so if YOU think YOU can't even keep a simple promise,
STOP promising me k?
i appreciate it.
i won't be angry if YOU tell me that YOU can't promise me that,
but at least u didn't promise right?
so i won't be angry.
then now what?
always become my fault after quarrel.
what the FUCK is THIS.
can't take this nonsense and shit that YOU gave me.
and ya,it's my "fault"!sorry!i know you will feel happy this way.
PISSED OFF!

-my little secret mysteries-

2007-08-19T00:25:00.001-07:00

I am gonna blog for this,
some thing's really got on my nerves.
i don't know why some people just have to make things difficult for others?
and watching them die?making a dead path for him/her?
is it because that they don't like him/her?
watching him/her die or making him/her die makes them feels better?or even happy?
didn't they knew that,
1 day,somewhere,sometime,
such things might happen to them?
and having their retribution?
making their live worst than hell?
oh my god.
i couldn't think of that!
even though,i hate someone,or i should say,dislike?
i don't really want them dead.
i dislike someone for a good reason,
and not just because of some actions they did,
like acting cute,or whatever,
that make me dislike them.
i am not such a person,ain't i?
it's like,i dislike a person,
cause,they did something bad to me,
like backstabbing me,or trying to make me as their scapegoat.
OR,
when i didn't even do anything,
they just say things behind my back.
which makes everyone dislike me,
by psycho-ing them.
AND 1 more,GOSSIPING!
it IRKS me badly.
but importantly,i don't show out that i dislike him/her.
why there's so much of this TYPE of people in earth.
can't everyone live in peace and harmony?
helping one another when they have any difficulties,
rather than watching them die?
does making all these make YOU happy?
if yes,i think,
they have to see a psychiatrists,
cause,i think that,
they are just a psycho.
making peoples' live like hell,by making themselves happy.
that's what i can say.
why should we take so much trouble to do all these,
making harm to others.
just lead YOUR own live,
leave others alone.
dislike people?
that's your problem.
don't drag others in.
i know,
not everyone is being well liked by others,
even me,myself,
i knew,somehow,
no matter how GOOD my personality is,
there are always SOME who will dislike me.
BUT,i take it as nothing happen,
cause,it's ME MYSELF.
i don't need people to change my style,personality or whatever.
why should i act like someone who is not my real person?
does it feels good?
it feels weird and it make me don't even like myself anymore.
felt SO FAKE!
different people have their own personality,
characters,and so on.
each and one of them are SPECIAL.
can't because of their specialty,
dislike them or what.
even if YOU,dislike others,
a lot of others DISLIKE YOU TOO.
don't think that you are perfect in all ways.
as what i said in my previous post,
none is perfect.
even me myself,
are not perfect.
by doing harms to others,
will make a lot of others dislike you more.
try to accept others and not criticizing them.
it will make our lives better,as well as for others.
this post is to tell others,
don't always see others bad point,
they will always have good point some how in them.
and most importantly,
FORGIVE AND FORGET.
makes ones feels better,
than carrying hatred around with you.
i loved being carefree,
i want peace,
last of all,
i want to thank my few true beloved friends,
who always stayed by my side,
no matter what happen.
helping me whenever i needed help.
accompany me through my unhappy days.
THANKS LOTS!
not like some hypocrites around me,
trying all ways to harm me,
felt so SCARY!
but,HAHA,i won't lose such battle,i fight it through.
or maybe i will just leave,
rather than always stayed,
and see people's FACE.
Heeeeeeee!
i know my beloved friends can't read this,
cause,this blog i am keeping it a personal blog,
which only me able to see it,
maybe someone might be able to glance through this blog in accident,
but i won't know it.
i am still keeping it a secret blog.

-my little secret mysteries-

2007-08-14T01:54:00.000-07:00

OH MY GOD!
WHAT THE HELL!
SO FUCKING STRESSED!

-my little secret mysteries-

2007-08-10T22:37:00.000-07:00

Just trying out new things in blog.And i am gonna write some rubbish here!
Well i can't say that it is rubbish,cos i have some rubbish friends.
HYPOCRITES!
oh my goodness!finally shown some colors of them.
Although to say the truth,
actually i have already seen it real early.
Some people just think they are real PERFECT in their life,
when actually they are not?they didn't know it?
oh i am so sorry!REAL SORRY!
OOPS i forgotten they only criticized people around them,
ugly,fat,retards and whatsoever?
and they actually think themselves as PERFECT!
oh gosh!i pity them!
indeed they have lots of bad points within them,but so sad,they never knew it.
even though THEY themselves looks UGLY too,but do they criticized themselves?
OH NO WAY!
they won't do that to themselves.
Who else would be so stupid to admit they are ugly too?
Well for me,it's okay for people to criticized me,
i don't really mind,cos i can know where can i change myself to a better person.
UNLIKE SOME people,who refuse to accept what people says about them.
ya so what i have some bad points?
not everyone's perfect right?
do they have to be angry over such a small things?
or aren't they just a petty ass?
it's okay to show me attitude,fine with me.
BUT do i need to see your fucking face in front of me everyday?
SORRY NO WAY!
it's like i don't have to follow you and you think you are a BIG FUCK or what?
when everyone just have to listen to your order of where to go for lunch?
without you,it's fine with me.
i can be a loner,and don't have to follow HYPOCRITES around.
being loner is better than being together with HYPOCRITES.
am i right?
hohoho!1 day,i will be prepared,when you want to find me to talk it all out.
i'll be waiting for your challenge eh?
wanna quarrel?sure?c'mon DUDE!
woo hoo!
This is all referring to a particular guy;)
don't get mad eh?
HEHE,no offence.

-my little secret mysteries-