Thursday, September 27, 2007
what the fuck?now i am kinda moody after quarreling with somebody.
is not i am unreasonable that i wanted to find something to quarrel with him.
do you think i like to quarrel?no way!
i hate quarreling with people.i like peace.
is not that i wanted to hurt your pride ok?
if you hadn't complain so much about this and that,
will i so be fucked up?that makes me wanna hurt your pride?
it's never a single day that i won't heard complains from you.
you are never a day well enough.
play awhile of games, you say yours eyes pain and feels giddy.
if that's the case, you should jolly well know your limits.
if you can't play games for too long, just say so.
i won't even eat you up.if you think you are tired,and should stop playing games,say so.
this is not the first time i hear all this from you.
a lot of times, i have been hearing from you saying that, you felt giddy,headache or whatever shits.
then why forced yourself ?
you knew very well that my talking way is a little harsh to you.
saying that you are weak,"ahgua",useless or whatever.
if i never harsh to you,will you be able know your limits?
and do you ever know, whenever you told me all this, i felt so worried?
being harsh to you, is meant for your own good. so that you can go rest.
but you didn't know my intention.
instead of this, you add in another word useless to describe yourself when i didn't even say that.
you think i am saying you useless but i am not.
i want you to know your limits well.
if u can't do it then don't forced yourself to do it.
can you please understand.
and when you always like that, i feel so fucked up.
so definitely i will be angry with you.
but then after that, what did you do?
you keep thinking why i treat you like that. all this all that.
then you told me you can't remember your names all this shit.
ALL THIS IS TOTALLY SHIT!
i fucking don't believe all this kind of things.
is not that you have a knock on your head badly that makes you can't remember who you are.
i know that you saying all this is want me to put all my focus on you.
want me to show more concern instead of angry with you.
if you really can't remember you name,
then i suggest, you should go for a mental health check.
if you really got mental problem. then i can understand why you can't remember your name.
but since you don't have mental problem,i don't see a reason for you can't remember your own name.
all this are all nonsense!
don't keep using all this kind of excuses for me to pity you or make me not angry with you.
i really hate it.
don't say i never remind you,
if you keep finding all sorts of nonsense excuses,or even trying to do something foolish,by making me not angry with you,instead of worrying for you,
don't blame me from drifting further away from you!i am serious.
stop using all this to bluff and threaten me.
sometimes i felt so stressed, that you might really do foolish things.
i felt that i should stay further away from you.
but i can't. i have feelings too.
i hate people whose thinking are so damn immature and so unrealistic.
please,get a life. stop living in your dream.
and can you, please stop lying and bluffing or even threatening me(like suicide,holding your breathe and etc), just because you wanted me to stay by your side?
making me feel guilty?makes you happy?is that your love for me like this?
i really wanted to know....the real answer....
